As a suffix, this maybe combined with terms as a prefix to denote a specific gender identity; for example, cisgender, transgender, agender.
gender identity; for example, cisgender, transgender, agender.
" /> gender identity; for example, cisgender, transgender, agender. " />As a suffix, this maybe combined with terms as a prefix to denote a specific gender identity; for example, cisgender, transgender, agender.
Used to denote one’s romantic attractions, particularly when one’s romantic attraction differs to their sexual attraction.
For example, asexual individuals may describe themselves as being asexual (that is, with little or no sexual attraction to others), but heteroromantic, biromantic or homoromantic (having a romantic, rather than sexual attraction); or indeed, may describe themselves as being aromantic (little to no romantic attraction).
Not exclusive to asexual individuals either, though: somebody may be bisexual but exclusively heteroromantic or homoromantic; that is, although sexually attracted to more than one gender, but only romantically attracted to one; or, further; one may be bisexual, but aromantic.
A suffix denoting one’s sexual attraction, and, when aligned, their romantic or emotional attractions too (e.g. homosexual, heterosexual, asexual, bisexual).
However, when one’s sexual and/or emotional/romantic attractions are not aligned, the identity may be followed with a -romantic identity; such as bisexual/homoromantic.
a slang term originating in the US for someone who is “obviously” Queer – that is, they are ‘visible from a 100 feet away’.
A prefix that denotes “without”; often used in regards to romantic, sexual and gender identities: e.g. aromantic, asexual and agender.
abbreviation for the asexual spectrum.
an individual whose sexuality fluctuates rapidly and/or with great intensity, often with the implication that it often feels the sexuality itself changes. Because the implication is that the sexualities involved cover more than one gender, abrosexual is often included under the bisexual+ umbrella.
Many bisexual+ individuals experience a degree of fluidity or fluctuations in their attractions, for example, going through a stage where their attractions gravitate more towards a certain gender or gender expression than another, and may not necessarily mean that they are abrosexual (for example, a bisexual person may find they go through a period of time where they are strongly drawn to people of the same gender).
The difference between this fluctuation may be that it is so rapid compared to other fluctuations, and/or that it is so intense that it almost feels as if they are no longer one sexuality but another – for example, a person who finds they rapidly and/or intensely fluctuate between exclusive or primary attraction to the same gender (e.g. being gay or lesbian), to exclusive or primary attraction to a different gender (e.g. being straight), or even between those and being attracted without consideration for gender (e.g. bisexual, pansexual, etc), to the point where each label feels temporary.
In a general sense, the practice of restraining oneself from indulging in something; for example, alcohol. However, it has become commonly associated with the abstaining of sex – and in Queer lexicon, typically refers to the conscious decision not to engage in same-sex relations, usually because a religious, cultural or political belief forbids it.
For example, in many conservative, homophobic religions, they may insist that same-sex attracted people abstain from sexual relations to abide by their religion. Abstinence is usually part of the course in “conversion therapy“.
This should not be confused with asexuality, which is not a conscious choice, but a lack of sexual desire.
a slang term for someone who is bisexual.
Put simply, acceptance is the willingness for a society or culture to allow people to be who they are, despite their identity. That is, the degree in which a person is actively allowed to participate in social interactions, either with groups or other individuals.
In Queer contexts, this means the ability for Queer individuals to participate in the workplace, in social situations and institutions and to live without fear, prejudice or stigma. To live authentically, without discrimination.
A term for those on the asexual spectrum, and the asexual spectrum itself.
a slang term for someone who is asexual, but alloromantic (not aromantic)
an individual on the asexual spectrum, who finds their sexuality fluctuates between being asexual and allosexual.
The romantic equivalent is aroflux.
The range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment of asexual individuals and/or individuals on the asexual spectrum. This results in the erasure and invisibility of asexuals (asexual erasure).
Acephobia is unfortunately not restricted to the heterosexual community, as asexuals have, and continue to face, opposition from members of the Queer community; particularly, but not restricted to, asexual people who are not homoromantic or biromantic.
an individual who possesses acephobia; an adjective describing attitudes and behaviours that are hostile or negative towards asexual people and/or those on the asexual spectrum.
an umbrella term for same-gender loving men or man-aligned people, such as gay men and bisexual+ men; an alternative to terms such as men who have sex with men, and used to describe the topics, activities and ideas around it: for example, achillean relations, achillean people, achillean literature.
It arose in the mid-2010s as a masculine equivalent to the term sapphic. It is named after Achilles, a Greek mythological figure who has been interpreted as having a close romantic or sexual relationship with his close wartime comrade, Patroclus.
A person who actively seeks to speak or write in favour of a cause, particularly regarding marginalised groups. In Queer contexts, a person who actively seeks to end inequality of LGBTQIA+ people and causes, e.g. an advocate for same-sex marriage; a transgender rights advocate.
an asexual spectrum identity, in which individuals experience arousal at the thought of sexual behaviours, but experience no or little sexual attraction towards other people, or someone who experiences sexual attraction, but does not want to participate in sex; for example, an individual may masturbate, watch pornography or watch other sexual content, but still not desire to engage in sexual behaviours with other people.
This may manifest in a myriad of ways, for example, an aegosexual individual may fantasise about watching other individuals engage in sex, and not about in engaging in it themselves.
Aegosexuality was previously known as autochorisexual, a term coined by Dr. Anthony Bogaert, a psychologist that specialised in human sexuality; however, it was considered a kind of psychological disorder (along with asexuality in general). Whilst some within that identity attempted to reclaim the term, others felt uncomfortable with the negative connotations, and aegosexual was coined by a Tumblr user named Sugar-and-Spite.
acronym of assigned female at birth.
in Polari, it is a term for a ‘lover’.
Outside of Polari, an affair is a relationship between two people in which one of them (or perhaps both) is also engaged in a relationship with someone else – for example, if someone is “having an affair”, it means they are engaging in a relationship outside of their existing, committed relationship (usually in secrecy, or supposed secrecy).
the age at which an individual is legally able to give their consent; for example, the age at which an individual is legally able to consent to sex.
The age of consent has been a particular part of the Queer rights debate, as many countries and states within them have had differing ages of consent for homosexual and heterosexual acts, and at which age transgender youth should be allowed to navigate and seek medical therapies (e.g. hormonal) without parental permission.
It also may relate to the various laws in which transgender and nonbinary individuals may access medical treatment.
agency is the ability for individuals, groups and cultures to act and think for themselves; to entrust them to act in their own best interests, and to navigate their own paths; to be able to act independently and make their own free choices.
In Queer contexts, this may mean the ability for individuals to identify with their sexual or gender identity, without groups outside of that identity making decisions in their name or subjecting them to legislation or social prejudice which prevents them from living fulfilled lives or prevents them from navigating the various social, cultural and legal institutions to which other people have access.
For individuals with intersex variations, this may mean the ability for intersex individuals to make informed choices surrounding medical options and interventions that are based on necessity, or with health considerations in mind that are based on what is best for the intersex individual themselves, rather than on social, cultural or medical perceptions that view intersex as something that needs correcting.
A person with no, or very little, connection to the concept or traditional system of gender; someone who does not align with the traditional concepts of either being a man or woman, and/or someone who sees themselves as not having a gender at all (i.e. “without gender”), or an experience of gender that is not commonly understood.
A model for sexual orientation and its application in real life, based around attraction, identity and behaviour (AIB).
As such, one can divide their experience of sexuality by describing their attraction (e.g. being attracted to multiple genders), the identity they choose (e.g. bisexual, pansexual, whether or not they are ‘out‘, or present publicly as heterosexual), and the behaviours they engage in (whether they choose to act on same-gender attractions, whether they engage in polyamorous relationships, etc).
An abbreviation for Acquired immunodeficiency/immune deficiency syndrome. It is a syndrome caused by HIV. However, not everybody who is HIV+ has AIDS.
AIDS causes the body’s immune system to be damaged, and as a result, compromises the body’s ability to fight off diseases and keep the body healthy, and thus can cause severe, life-threatening complications.
There is no cure for AIDS, but there are treatments to keep people with AIDS more healthy. This is why HIV prevention, such as safe sex, is important.
a less prominent alternative term to lithromantic (a form of romantic attraction on the aromantic spectrum in which individuals experience romantic attraction but do not want it to be reciprocated).
alternate term for lithosexual, although not as common (a form of sexual attraction on the asexual spectrum in which individuals experience sexual attraction but do not want it to be reciprocated).
In Queer contexts, alignment generally refers to whether two or more parts of an identity are in cohesion or not; whether they ‘match’ or are ‘different’.
In gender identity, one such example is the alignment of birth sex and gender. Typically, a transgender individual is transgender because their birth sex and perceived gender do not align; for example, a Trans man may be assigned female at birth, but identify as a woman – therefore, their assigned sex at birth and gender identity do not align. They may therefore take steps to align their sex and gender, by undergoing gender reassignment surgery, hormone therapy, and/or going through the various steps needed to officially recognise their gender.
A cisgender person generally has their sex and gender aligned; their sex assigned at birth and gender identity are the same.
In sexual identity, this may refer to the alignment between one’s sexual attractions and one’s romantic attractions. This is particularly pertinent with people on the asexual spectrum: their sexual identity (asexual) may not be aligned with their romantic identity (for example, homoromantic). Similarly, an aromantic person may be homosexual (e.g. homosexual-aromantic). An asexual with their sexual and romantic identities aligned may be aromantic as well.
In allosexual people, an example would be somebody who is bisexual but homoromantic. That is, somebody who is sexually attracted to their own and other genders, but only romantically attracted to their own.
In gender identities, being aligned may also refer to experiences nonbinary individuals have: for example, a nonbinary individual may describe themselves as male-aligned, because of the experiences they have with being male.
the assumption that an individual is allosexual – that is, that a person is not asexual.
an individual who is not aromantic; that is, an individual who experiences a romantic attraction to other people.
a term that refers to those who are not asexual. Simply, those who regularly experience a sexual attraction; those who are not on the asexual spectrum.
acronym of Assigned Male at Birth.
a term typically used by medical practitioners to describe the genitals of intersex infants whose genitalia do not appear as ‘typically’ either male or female. Such an example would be genitalia that are not “completely developed”, or display characteristics of both male and female anatomies. Considered a “disorder of sex development” in medical terminology.
People with “ambiguous genitalia” may have other intersex variations that aren’t immediately apparent; similarly, those without “ambiguous genitalia” may possess other intersex variations.
A pressing human rights issue in this regard is so-called “corrective surgery” which seeks to cosmetically alter an infant’s genitalia or physical anatomy without their consent to “normalise” their intersex variations.
“Ambiguous genitalia”, like “disorder of sex development”, are terms that are considered problematic and rejected by many intersex people.
Ambisexual has had two meanings in parlance, relating to either sexuality or gender identity. However, the sexual identity is now more prevalent.
Ambisexual – in sexuality – means someone of an ambiguous sexuality, meaning, somebody who is bisexual+.
In gender identity, it is someone of an ambiguous gender; for example, someone who is androgynous.
a sexual act that involves penetration of the anus. Whilst the practice is commonly associated with men that have sex with men (and as such, formed the basis of many anti-gay buggery and sodomy laws and religious teachings), anal sex also forms part of the variety of sexual activities taken by opposite-sex couples and same-sex female couples.
When the practice takes place with the aid of an artificial phallus, e.g. a dildo or strap-on, it is known as pegging.
A nonbinary gender identity associated with androgynous individuals; typically having a gender that is simultaneously feminine and masculine – but not necessarily in equal amounts. Androgynes may identify further as transgender, nonbinary and/or genderqueer.
Typically used as an adjective to describe someone’s appearance as being a mixture of typically masculine/feminine traits. It was previously used to describe intersex individuals, although this definition has fallen out of favour.
An individual whose gender expression can be described as a mixture of both masculinity and femininity, or has elements of each.
Alternative term for androsexual.
an individual who is romantically, but not necessarily sexually attracted, to men, male-aligned people and/or masculinity (e.g. masculine expression). An androromantic person may not necessarily be androsexual.
Androromantic individuals may not consider themselves to be homoromantic or heteroromantic, as it may be an attraction to masculinity regardless of gender identity, or describe a nonbinary person’s attraction to masculinity where homo/hetero labels may not be applicable.
An individual who is primarily attracted – sexually, romantically and/or emotionally – to masculinity, male-align people, masculine expression and/or men, regardless of gender identity or whether they were assigned male at birth, and without reference to one’s own gender identity: as such androsexual people may not be heterosexual or homosexual; for example, an androsexual person may be nonbinary, or attracted to those who are on the “masculine spectrum”, regardless of gender and sex.
Androsexuality is often used as alternative to homosexual/heterosexual in the attraction spectrum, where femininity (gynesexuality) is on one end, masculinity (androsexuality) on the other, and bisexuality inbetween. Androsexuality is also sometimes included in the bisexual+ umbrella.
a less common equivalent to acephobia – a prejudice or dislike of asexual people and those on the asexual spectrum.
an abbreviation of aromantic.
an individual who is asexual, aromantic – (aro–ace).
an identity on the aromantic spectrum, in which an individual fluctuates between being aromantic and alloromantic.
an individual who experiences little or no romantic attraction (but may experience sexual attraction – e.g. aromantic/bisexual); as such aromantic people may not necessarily be asexual.
Aromantic is also an umbrella term for the wide array of identities that fall under the aromantic umbrella: such as demiromantic, lithromantic, frayromantic, greyromantic and others.
Aromanticism and aromantic identities are typically included in the asexual spectrum.
the wide array of aromantic identities that can be loosely defined as being either aromantic, or somewhere between being aromantic and alloromantic; for example, greyromantic, lithromantic, demiromantic, frayromantic, aroflux.
the wide variety of identities that can be loosely grouped as being aromantic to some degree, and therefore on the aromantic spectrum.
the wide range of negative attitudes, opposition to, and/or resentment of aromantic individuals and aromanticism. This may manifest itself in many ways, such as disregarding aromantic identity and experiences, exclusion from Queer spaces, and/or viewing aromanticism as a disorder that needs to be cured.
An umbrella term for a variation in romantic/sexual attractions on the asexual spectrum, but typically, an individual that experiences little or no sexual attraction to others, or those with a lack or little romantic attraction in others.
Those who are asexual may also have further labels to describe their romantic attractions (e.g. asexual, biromantic – someone having a romantic attraction to multiple genders, but no sexual attraction to them); demisexual, fraysexual, lithosexual, etc. Asexuals may not necessarily be aromantic.
the acts and attitudes of ignoring, removing or falsifying asexual and aromantic people and identity. In its most extreme form, this could be the belief that asexuality doesn’t exist, or is the result of people on the asexual spectrum being ‘broken’ or the result of a mental/sexual dysfunction, rather than as a legitimate, sexual orientation.
Erasure of asexual people is often the result of acephobia, even though it does not always involve overt antagonism; asexual erasure and invisibility inevitably has a detrimental effect on asexual people’s individual health and well-being.
the wide variety of identities that can be loosely defined as being either asexual or aromantic; the spectrum in which these identities are placed upon in relation to one another.
the umbrella of asexual related identities – that is, the identities found on the asexual spectrum – including the array of aromantic identities.
An individual who was assigned the sex of female at birth. Typically used by transgender and nonbinary individuals to describe their ‘birth sex‘.
For example, a trans man may be known on their medical records as being assigned female at birth, or describe themselves as such – that is, when they were born, they were identified as being ‘female’.
Intersex individuals may also use the term to describe the birth sex that was assigned to them, although it should also be noted that intersex individuals do not necessarily identify differently to their sex assigned at birth.
An individual who was assigned the sex of male at birth. Typically used by transgender and nonbinary individuals to describe their ‘birth sex‘.
For example, a trans woman may be known on their medical records as being assigned male at birth, or describe themselves as such – that is, when they were born, they were identified as being ‘male’.
Intersex individuals may also use the term to describe the birth sex that was assigned to them, although it should also be noted that intersex individuals do not necessarily identify differently to their sex assigned at birth.
The complicated set of thoughts and feelings that evoke one into having a likeness, desire or interest in something.
In relationships, this can be typically broken down into sexual, romantic and emotional attractions. Typically, these three things are aligned, but not always – and breaking down the attractions can be complicated.
For example, an individual may be sexually attracted to more than one gender (bisexual) but only romantically attracted to one (e.g. homoromantic, heteroromantic). Further, someone’s emotional attractions may not be the same as their romantic ones.
Human relationships, and therefore their attractions, are complex; as too, can defining the various kinds of intimacy that form attractions. One can be intimate on sexual, romantic and emotional levels that may share many features, but also be completely distinct from one another – sexual intimacy may share many features to emotional intimacy, but not all forms of emotional intimacy have sexual elements, similarly not all features of emotional intimacy have romantic elements. Similarly; sexual intimacy or attraction does not necessarily require emotional or romantic intimacy or even attraction.
You can, on a basic level, be emotionally or romantically attracted to someone without being sexually attracted to them, as you can be sexually attracted to someone without being emotionally or romantically attracted to them.
gay slang term for a middle-aged or older Queer man – typically, but not exclusively, a homosexual one.
an individual who is aroused by sexual material, thoughts and fantasies, but has no desire or ambition to seek sexual relations with other people; for example, an individual who may masturbate and watch pornography, but does not have any desire to engage in sexual behaviours with other people.
a term now most commonly known as aegosexual, in which individuals experience a disconnect between the thought of sexual behaviours, and engaging in sexual behaviours. For example, an individual who may experience arousal at the thought of sex, but without the desire to actually engage in it.
in gay slang, somebody who is young or recently out – e.g. baby gay, baby dyke, baby Queer, baby bi.
a young or recently out bisexual person.
a young, or recently out, gay person.
a young or recently out Queer person.
a darkened room in venues where sexual activity can take place. Also known as a dark room.
a Polari term describing the bulge of male genitals through clothes.
See also: basket shopping.
Polari term for checking out someone’s ‘private areas’ through their clothes.
in gay slang, gay saunas frequented by gay and bisexual men for sexual encounters.
an individual who frequents gay saunas.
a slang term originating in Jamaica for a gay or effeminate man. Considered offensive.
an initialism for bondage, discipline/dominance, submission/sadism and masochism. A form of sexual activity in which arousal is gained from activities and practices involving power-play between a servant and master.
a term used in the Queer community to describe butch – that is, muscular, beefy or chunky – men with an abundance of body hair, beards, etc.; a look that would be described as very, and stereotypically, masculine.
The opposite to a bear is a twink.
gay slang for a man who pursues bears (the people, not the animal!).
a slang term for a woman that a gay man marries or has a relationship with in order to hide his homosexuality.
The term can be problematic when used to describe relationships in which the male participant is presumed to be exclusively gay, when in fact, he could be bisexual+.
a public area frequented by men looking to have sexual relations with other men, typically ones that are discreet in order to serve closeted MSMs.
a Polari term for the labia.
a pejorative slang term for men who have sex with men, but, by connotation, extended to all Queer people. However, the term has been reclaimed, somewhat successfully, particularly by gay men.
Related: bent.
a slang term, generally considered problematic and a slur when used by non-Queer people, to describe Queer people, particularly men who have sex with men. The opposite to ‘bent’ is straight, the common-use term for heterosexual.
Related: bender.
abbreviation of bisexual.
the idea that bisexual+ people should be excluded from Queer spaces and venues, typically due to them not being “gay enough”, typically, but not exclusively, when they are currently in an opposite-sex couple – or a coupling that people perceive as heterosexual.
Such biphobic discourse has also included the idea that the visibility and acceptance of bisexual individuals are a threat to gay and lesbian identity, and can often be found among trans-exclusionary radical feminists and their allies.
It’s a form of discrimination, biphobia and bisexual erasure that sadly isn’t rare in the Queer community, and an example of Queer gatekeeping.
a prefix used in regards to romantic, sexual or gender identities. For example, biromantic, bisexual, bicurious, bigender.
a modern Queer slang term that is the bisexual equivalent of gaydar: that is, the intuitive ability to spot a bisexual+ person.
gay slang for an iconic bisexual+ individual.
a person who is experiencing an interest in relationships, romance or sexual experiences with a person of the same gender or sex. Typically used to describe heterosexual people considering or interested in experiences with people of the same gender/sex for the first time (although not exclusively). Sometimes spelt bi-curious.
an individual that sees themselves as having ‘two’ or ‘double’ genders, either simultaneously or varying between the two. Typically these genders are seen as male and female, or, indeed, masculine and feminine, but may also include nonbinary identities. Bigender individuals may further identify as being more masculine/male or feminine/female leaning.
Bigender individuals may present as androgynous, or present as more masculine or feminine dependent on circumstances or feelings. They may also experience a fluctuation in dysphoria.
Not to be confused with bisexual or biromantic.
the intolerant, unreasonable and determined devotion to one’s own opinions and prejudice, particularly against a particular group or community, often with hatred and intolerance, and with a refusal to entertain conflicting evidence or opinions.
Someone who is bigoted to the Queer community may refuse to even entertain the notion that their anti-Queer beliefs are wrong or based on faulty reasoning: for example, an individual may try to justify their prejudice on the basis of superstition (e.g. because of their religion). A bigot may assert that sexual activity between people of the same gender is wrong or unnatural without any evidence whatsoever to support it; similarly, a bigot may assert that transgender identities are merely the result of mental illness or are not legitimate, based solely on their own beliefs and opinions, with no interest in what medical or psychological experts have to say.
in Polari slang, a “fool” – somebody who is easily duped.
In common parlance, a bimbo is an attractive but unintelligent woman.
in Queer contexts, this usually refers to the gender binary; but this can also refer to related notions regarding various spectrums within Queer identities, either as extreme points or as the belief that such spectrums do not exist.
Such an example would be the sexuality spectrum; where both binary points would be homosexuality and heterosexuality on either end, with bisexuality and the various bisexual+ identities occupying the space in between. However, a binary belief would be that people are either heterosexual or homosexual.
also known as the gender binary or sex binary; it is the idea that there is only two genders (related to sex) that are male and female, and that everyone is either one or the other. Heavily disputed.
a piece of material – typically made of cloth strips, elastic or non-elastic bandages or purpose-built undergarments that flatten the breasts, known as binding.
the act of flattening one’s breasts using a binder. The act of breast-binding is typically done by trans men, as well as androgynous or nonbinary people (as well as Drag Kings) in order to make the breasts less prominent and/or in order to look less feminine. This may be in order to combat dysphoria.
an alternative to faux king – that is, a cisgender male drag king, except far more problematic as it carries connotations that transgender female-to-male individuals aren’t really ‘male’.
an alternative to faux queen – that is, a cisgender female drag queen, except far more problematic as it carries connotations that transgender male-to-female individuals aren’t really ‘male’.
a medical term used to refer to the chromosomal, hormonal and/or anatomical characteristics used to classify and designate a sex of an individual – typically male or female.
The range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment of bisexual+ individuals, that results in the erasure and invisibility of bisexuals (bisexual erasure).
Biphobia is sadly not restricted to heterosexual people, as bisexual+ individuals have also experienced biphobia from members of the LGBT+ community, such as negative and intolerant attitudes towards bisexuals from gay men and lesbians.
Somebody who possesses biphobia can be described as biphobic.
an individual who possesses biphobia; an adjective describing attitudes and behaviours that are hostile or negative towards bisexual+ people.
a person who experiences romantic, but not necessarily sexual, attractions to multiple or all genders. A biromantic person may not necessarily be bisexual.
An alternative to biological sex.
a person who experiences romantic/sexual (or exclusively sexual when used with an -romantic qualifier) to multiple or all genders; somebody who is neither monosexual or asexual.
An increasingly common misconception is that bisexuality is an attraction to men and women exclusively, to the exclusion of nonbinary or transgender people, due to the prefix “bi”, meaning “two”, referring to the two extreme points of the gender binary. This has been fiercely rejected by the bisexual community; many of whom are transgender or nonbinary themselves.
The definition of bisexuality has also referred to being simultaneously heterosexual and homosexual in varying degrees (“homo-” meaning same, “hetero-” meaning different).
Bisexuality can also be seen as the middle spectrum between androsexuality and gynesexuality, or as being simultaneously androsexual and gynesexual.
As a result, bisexuality – in the theoretical sense – encompasses a wide variety of other identities, such as polysexual, pansexual, bicurious, multisexual, omnisexual, etc. Together, these form what is known as the bisexual+ umbrella.
As such, bisexual people may also identify alongside other identities such as polysexual, omnisexual or pansexual, and it’s also important to note that pan, poly, omni, etc, people may not necessarily identify as bi as well.
Bisexuals may not necessarily experience attraction to every gender in similar amounts; for example, somebody who identifies as bisexual may be primarily more attracted to one gender more than another.
the acts and attitudes of ignoring, removing or falsifying bisexual/bisexual+ people and bisexual identity. In its most extreme form, this could be the belief that bisexuality doesn’t exist – a belief that had long been traditionally held by straight and gay people alike (“you’re either gay or straight”).
In more subtle forms, this could be misconceptions such as that bisexual people are merely undecided, not fully out-of-the-closet, hypersexual, in a phase, following a fad, or the acceptance of bisexuality in women but not men. Another common form of bisexual erasure is in media where people and characters are designated as gay or straight respectively, depending on the sex/gender of their partner, which ignores a large part of their identity and agency.
Bisexual Erasure is often the result of biphobia, although it does not always involve overt antagonism. Bisexual Erasure and Invisibility has been shown to have a detrimental effect on bisexual individual’s health and well-being.
an alternative term for bisexual erasure.
an umbrella term encompassing sexualities that are not monosexual or asexual in nature; an umbrella term for bisexual, pansexual, polysexual, omnisexual, etc identities.
An alternative umbrella term for bisexual+ is multisexual.
the romantic and/or sexual attraction and behaviour related to bisexual+ individuals; topics related to bisexual people, distinct from discussions related to homosexuality.
a Polari term meaning “good”.
a Polari term, meaning “nice to see your pretty face!”.
in Queer male slang, the bottom is an individual who prefers to “receive” rather than “give” during intercourse (as opposed to a top).
a part of gender reassignment surgery that relates to the ‘bottom’ part of one’s anatomy (as opposed to ‘top‘ [the chest]) – the genitals, e.g. vulvoplasty, vaginoplasty, phalloplasty, metoidioplasty.
pieces of material, typically made of silicon, that are placed in a bra on top of one’s breasts to make them look bigger; in nonbinary and transgender contexts, bra inserts may be used to help alleviate gender dysphoria by giving the appearance of breasts in feminine-presenting people.
Also known as binding.
a Queer slang term for a heterosexual. Considered problematic.
a culturally specific term in Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander lexicon to refer to transgender, nonbinary and other gender diverse individuals who have a ‘male‘ spirit and take on male roles within the community.
as a verb, it is a term similar to sodomise, which generally means to commit a sexual act that is not vaginal intercourse between a man and a woman, most often when referring to anal sex.
As such, it became used as a noun to refer to people who committed buggery (much like an equivalent to sodomite), but in more recent times, has become – particularly in the United Kingdom, Ireland, Australia and New Zealand – a general swear word, often used casually and in a variety of ways, much like the word ‘fuck’, or the equivalent ‘sod’, – e.g. “bugger that”, “you cheeky bugger”, “the radio is buggered”, etc.
A fairly outdated term for anal sex; although originally it also included oral sex and bestiality: basically, inserting the penis anywhere other than a human vagina. Laws against same-sex relations were known as “Buggery Acts” or “Buggery Laws” in the UK, elsewhere, they were known as “Sodomy Laws”.
in gay slang, a hunky, muscular bodybuilder to the extreme.
an individual who identifies themselves as being masculine – physically, mentally and/or emotionally (as opposed to femme). Although it has often be used in a derogatory way to describe lesbians, many lesbians embrace the label as an affirmative identity label and a term of pride.
Butch is a Polari term, which also had the meaning of ‘upfront, strong’.
an initialism for coercively assigned female at birth.
an initialism for coercively assigned male at birth.
a Polari term, meaning “funny, flamboyant”, that is now used in both Queer and popular culture, referring to kitsch, flamboyant, exaggerated, theatrical, deliberately ironic and/or outrageous styles – which as a result, has come to describe many activities within the Queer community; for example, due to her outfits, Cher would be described as a camp icon.
It also used to describe effeminate, flamboyant men – typically those who are outrageous and theatrical in their mannerisms.
a Polari term meaning, ‘can I look/go around your house?’.
a term often used on dating apps targeted towards men who have sex with men, where individuals stipulate that they are not able to ‘host’ the sexual encounter at their place of residence. Typically for reasons related to being in the closet to housemates or neighbours, living with family who may not accept such encounters happening, or because the individual has a live-in partner.
Typically used by individuals looking for discreet sexual encounters.
a portmanteau of celebrity and lesbian, celesbian is a slang term for a female celebrity known or reputed to be a lesbian that is popular in the Queer community.
the conscious and deliberate decision to abstain from marriage and sexual relations, typically for religious reasons, but also as part of the harmful practices of “conversion therapy” which seeks to erase homosexual or bisexual feelings and identities.
This should not be confused with being asexual.
Queer slang for a lesbian and/or Queer (sapphic) woman who is sporty and athletic, as opposed to a lipstick lesbian; a sapphic woman who prefers the natural look over make-up.
a Polari term for a body part. See: thumping cheat (heart).
In common parlance regarding love and relationships, it usually means to betray one’s partner by engaging in sexual or romantic activity with somebody else.
a pejorative term to describe transgender women who have a penis.
gay slang for a younger twink.
See also: chickenhawk.
a slang term for bra inserts.
Somebody who is not transgender and/or nonbinary. An individual whose gender identity matches their sex assigned at birth; for example, a cisgender man is someone who presently identifies as being “male” or a “man”, and was also assigned male at birth. Cisgender individuals may also be hetero, homo, bi(+) or asexual; it is not necessarily related to their sexual identity.
An easy-to-use term for someone who is not Queer in the slightest, someone who is as straight as you can get; someone who is both cisgender and heterosexual.
the assumption that all individuals are cisgender, or that they are cisgender until shown otherwise.
Related: heteronormativity
the behaviour that gives preferential treatment to cisgender people as opposed to transgender, nonbinary, people with intersex variations or other gender identified people.
an individual who is ‘Queer’ (not straight or cisgender) but is currently not open to everybody (or anybody) about their identity. There are a number of reasons for being “in the closet” for example, a fear of rejection or one’s safety, disapproval from friends/family, or discrimination.
a term used by some intersex people to describe being assigned female at birth, with the added implication that this happened without their consent to erase their intersex status and/or identity, such as through “corrective surgery“.
a term used by some intersex people to describe being assigned male at birth, with the added implication that this happened without their consent to erase their intersex status and/or identity, such as through “corrective surgery“.
the act of accepting one’s identity as gender or sexually diverse (not straight or cisgender; Queer); the process in which one shares their sexual or gender identity with others – for example, coming out to friends or family as gay.
See also: in the closet, out and proud.
in sociology, a social group of people that share an identity or social structure (e.g. culture, norms, roles, values). Communities represent a sense of belonging for people, and an avenue for individuals within them to participate and have agency.
In Queer contexts, this may refer to the Queer community as a whole, or the various communities within it, e.g. the gay and lesbian community, the bisexual+ community, the transgender community, the nonbinary community, etc.
a thin pouch that prevents STIs and pregnancy by preventing bodily fluids from the penis (such as semen) from entering the orifice (opening) in which it is placed (e.g. a vagina, an anus, a mouth), and vice-versa, by preventing fluids from the opening from entering the penis.
There is a male condom (which is typically known as a ‘condom’) which goes over the male’s erect penis, or there is the female condom (‘femidom‘) which is inserted into the vagina.
The act of a couple choosing to have an open, non-exclusive romantic or sexual relationships; this may be polyamory or swinging, for example. That is, a situation in which both partners agree that one or both of them may partake in sexual or romantic relationships outside of their relationship.
This is different to cheating or adultery, where one partner is unaware of what is happening and believes they are in an exclusive relationship.
simply put, consent is the act of giving permission, voluntarily, to the proposals or desires of another human being. A primary example of consent is the permission given between two or more individuals to engage in physically intimate behaviour with each other. Without consent, such acts are rape.
Both legally, and morally, consent can be subject to outside influences and legislation; for example, although a person under a certain age may give their permission, the law may determine that they are too young to consent (as they have not yet reached the age of consent). It is important to note, too, that permission given after coercion (that is by force or threat, or through manipulation or emotional blackmail), is not consent.
In Queer contexts, consent has an important role in Queer history and modern-day rights issues facing the Queer community.
Particularly in regards to sexuality, the age of consent has been a pressing LGBTQIA+ rights issue, as many countries and states have differing ages of consent for heterosexual and homosexual acts.
Various acts related to “conversion therapy“, particularly those performed on people under the age of eighteen who may be homosexual, bisexual+, asexual or transgender, have also come into the spotlight as a human rights issue, particularly as individuals may be there against their will or due to coercion (that is, without consent).
Consent is a particularly prevalent rights issue regarding intersex individuals, as often infants with an intersex variation may have been victim to “corrective surgery” – where no consent from the individual themselves could possibly have been given for surgery that is cosmetic or unnecessarily, rather than medically required.
Consent laws, particularly surrounding age, have become issues regarding to transgender youth, as seeking medical therapies to navigate their transgender identity may be subject to the permission of their parents, leading to discussions about what ages are appropriate for certain medical, non-surgical therapies (e.g. hormone therapy).
Informed consent is also an important factor to consent: that is, for consent to be given, one must be fully informed of the circumstances, consequences and conditions of the activity in which consent is given. This is particularly pertinent when it comes to accessing medical treatments.
a term used in polyamorous contexts to describe the arrangements and structure of polyamorous relationships.
Better known term for Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Change Efforts – the insidious practices enacted by homophobic, biphobic and transphobic groups and organisations that claim to “cure” people of their Queerness.
the highly damaging idea that an individual can be “cured” of their sexuality or gender identity through rape. The intended consequence of corrective rape is to force the victim to conform to a heteronormative standard through forced sexual contact.
It is prevalent worldwide, but is often found in conservative and/or deeply religious countries where homosexuality or gender nonconformity is unaccepted.
It has been documented to have happened by survivors of some extreme forms of “conversion therapy” practices.
in Queer contexts, this refers to the practice of “correcting” babies and toddlers with intersex variations with medical interventions. Although sometimes such interventions may be necessary (for example, to prevent or reduce future health problems, such as to improve urinary or faecal continence), many are controversial and seek to erase the intersex variations altogether; for example, to make the appearance of ambiguous genitalia more akin to what is typical for males and females. As such, corrective surgery in this regard refers to the cosmetic surgeries performed on infants without their consent, and as such considered an act of interphobia as it considers those with intersex variations to be in need of normalisation.
Increasingly, the practice has come under intense scrutiny – with many countries such as Malta banning the practice of non-consensual cosmetic medical interventions – and the practice being considered a human rights issue. The Council of Europe in 2015 recognised the right for intersex individuals to not undergo sex assignment treatment.
Corrective surgery should not be confused with gender reassignment surgery that takes place on consenting, transgender individuals.
British Queer slang for hooking up in public toilets.
the action of banning something by law. For a long time, homosexual acts were criminalised by sodomy and buggery laws, and still are in many places in the world.
The reversal of such laws are known as decriminalisation.
Legislation may push to criminalise discrimination against Queer identified people.
The act of wearing clothes traditionally associated with a gender different from one’s own. A person who participates in cross-dressing is known as a cross-dresser; although they may not necessarily identify as transgender.
Related: gender-bender; transvestite.
an individual who wears the clothes of another gender/sex. Such individuals may not identify as transgender or nonbinary, they may consider themselves cisgender. They may, or may not, label themselves a transvestite. Crossdressers may also have separate personas and/or names for when they are cross-dressing; this may not take the form of drag either.
People cross-dress for a range of reasons, including for relaxation, fun or sexual gratification. Some transgender individuals do discover their identity through cross-dressing (as well as other forms of gender variant expression), but it is important to conflate being transgender or nonbinary with cross-dressers or cross-dressing (that is, not to refer to transgender or nonbinary people as “crossdressers”.
used in the gay community to describe a young bear. That is, large, hairy guys in their teens or twenties, who will one day grow into bears.
a darkened room in venues where sexual activity can take place. Also known as a backroom.
A name in which a person may previously have been known. This may be particularly pertinent, but not exclusive to, transgender and nonbinary individuals who may have been born with a name different to the name they now go by.
For example, a man who was assigned female at birth may have been born with the name ‘Julia’, but since transitioning goes by the name ‘John’. This would make ‘Julia’ his deadname, and referring to him as ‘Julia’ would be an act of deadnaming.
Much like deliberately ignoring an individual’s preferred pronouns, deliberate deadnaming is considered transphobic.
The act of deliberately referring to someone by their deadname, that is, the name they may have been born with or previously known by.
the reversal of a criminalised activity; that is, allowing something that was once illegal to be legal again – for example, the reversal of sodomy/buggery laws that made homosexual acts illegal.
an individual who identifies partly, but not wholly, as a man/boy or masculine regardless of their designated sex at birth. This may be an individual designated male at birth who only identifies partly with being a man, or, a transmasculine person who identifies more with being male than female, but not entirely or to the point of identifying as a man.
Alternative: demiman, demimale.
Related: demigirl, deminonbinary
an alternate identity to demigirl.
an individual who describes their gender identity as only partially genderfluid. An example may be an individual assigned female at birth who feels part of their gender identity is statically female, but another part is fluid between male and nonbinary.
a gender identity which comprises of the words ‘demi’ (half) + gender. Demigender is an umbrella term for the various nonbinary identities beginning with demi: e.g. demigirl, demiboy, deminonbinary, demifluid.
Although the term linguistically states half, the idea behind demigender is that one identifies partly with a gender, rather than wholly, regardless of their assigned gender at birth.
an individual who identifies partly, but not wholly, as a woman/girl or feminine regardless of their designated sex at birth. This may be an individual designated female at birth who only identifies partly with being a woman, or, a transfeminine person who identifies more with being female than male, but not entirely or to the point of identifying as a woman.
Alternative: demiwoman, demifemale.
Related: demiboy, deminonbinary
an alternate identity to demiboy.
an alternate identity for demiboy.
an individual who experiences no or little romantic attraction until a strong attachment of some sort is formed, such as an emotional attachment (or perhaps sexual connection) is formed. May be compounded to form gender orientations, e.g. demi-homoromantic.
an individual who experiences no or little sexual attraction until they have formed an emotional, romantic connection towards someone. It must be noted that demisexuals are not abstaining or choosing to be celibate until forming a romantic connection – they experience little or no sexual attraction whatsoever until a romantic bond is formed.
Related: demiromantic
an alternate identity for demigirl.
the act of refusing to acknowledge one’s sexual or gender identity; not only living in the closet, but to purposely try and convince oneself that they are not Queer – for example, a same-sex attracted man who refuses to acknowledge or identify with his homosexuality/bisexuality, even when acting upon his same-sex sexual desires.
if a remark or comment is derogatory, it expresses a low opinion; as a result, there are many slang terms in use that refer to Queer identified people that are derogatory – that is, they exist to disrespect or belittle Queer people in a way that is deliberately offensive.
However, some of the terms (such as Queer itself), have been reclaimed.
the sex assigned at birth; that is, typically, male or female.
a slang term describing gay and bisexual men who are not out of the closet and not planning to be; on dating apps such as Grindr, individuals describing themselves as ‘discreet’ are generally looking for or offering sexual encounters that are casual, one-off and/or taking place without any romantic interest that will be kept secret – for example, a man who may be in a heterosexual relationship looking for no strings attached sex with another man; or a heterosexual-identified person who may be bicurious and looking to explore that side of their sexuality without people knowing.
Discreet may also be used by people in same-sex relationships who are looking for sexual encounters behind their partner’s back.
the unjust and/or prejudicial treatment of people based on a particular trait; for example, race, age, sex/gender identity, disability, sexual identity.
This can take many forms, such as exclusion or being treated less favourably. Discrimination may be indirect: that is, that there is a policy or rule that applies to everyone, but it has the effect of disadvantaging some people more due to a characteristic they share.
Increasingly, laws have been passed to prevent discrimination in areas of public life, such as employment, education and services – although exemptions apply – typically, but not exclusively, for religious organisations.
a Polari term meaning “sexy, attractive”, and also “to gossip”, as well as meaning “anus”.
For example, that man is a bit of a dish. What? You hooked up with him? Oh, dish the dirt – what was his dish like?
medical terminology for the wide variety of intersex variations, although the terminology is fast becoming questioned and debated as inappropriate, particularly as it may suggest something that needs ‘correcting’ (such as through corrective surgery).
An umbrella-term for LGBTQIAP+/Queer people; that is, those who aren’t straight and/or cisgender. Often abbreviated to DSG.
in same-sex male activity, the dominant partner is the top, the “giver”.
In BDSM, the dominant partner (“dom”) is the partner that exercises authority and will over the submissive partner (“sub”).
the policy adopted by the United States regarding gay, lesbian and bisexual people serving in the military – in which openly same-sex attracted people continued to be barred from military service, but closeted same-sex attracted people could serve so long as the kept their sexual orientation to themselves which the implication that other serving military personnel weren’t to inquire into a person’s sexuality either.
Similar policies were – officially or unofficially – in place elsewhere in the world.
This was eventually repealed in the United States, where gay and bisexual people can now serve openly.
a homosexual or bisexual male dishonorably discharged from the Navy due to their sexuality.
South African Queer slang for Gay Pride; e.g. “We’ll march on Doris Day”.
a slang term referring to men who identify as heterosexual but secretly have sex with men. Typically used in communities of colour.
the theatrical and performative act of sensationalised femininity, masculinity or other gender expression; taking the traditional or stereotypical gender presentation to a new hyper, artistic or surrealistic degree – typically, in the process, creating a character distinct from one’s own.
The term “drag” is a Polari term for ‘clothing’, and this is where we get the term drag queen and drag king from.
It is incredibly important for the art and act of Drag to not be conflated with transgender identities; these are two distinct things. Although there are Drag performers who are also transgender or identify as nonbinary, Drag performers, by default, are not transgender – many are cisgender. Drag is temporary: it exists for the entirety of one’s performance or night out, much like with an actor’s character.
There may be many shared features between, for example, transvestism/cross-dressing and Drag, such as character or identity creating, and there is no firm, fixed line that can separate’s what constitutes Drag and what is cross-dressing without Drag, although typically it is the intention (e.g. drag is typically for art or performance).
Drag performers, therefore, can be of any gender identity or sexual orientation.
Cisgender performers who perform sensationalised versions of their sex assigned at birth are known as faux queens and faux kings; that is, drag queens that are cisgender and assigned female at birth are known as faux queens, and drag kings that are cisgender and assigned male at birth are known as faux kings.
However, increasingly, the use of the “faux” label has been disregarded by the drag community as irrelevant and problematic, with transphobic implications; however, some “faux” kings and queens have embraced the identity.
an individual who performs, or simply dresses, in a hyper-masculine way, most often with a theatrical aspect.
It is important to note that being a Drag King is not a gender identity in itself: Drag Kings may be of any sexuality, and of any gender identity: being a Drag performer does not automatically mean that the performer is transgender or nonbinary.
A Drag King that is also a cisgender person assigned male at birth is known as a faux king (although some consider the label problematic).
an individual who performs, or dresses for effect, in a hyper-feminine way, most often with a theatrical aspect.
It is important to note that being a Drag Queen is not a gender identity in itself: Drag Queens may be of any sexuality, and of any gender identity: being a Drag performer does not automatically mean that the performer is transgender or nonbinary.
A Drag Queen that is cisgender and assigned female at birth is known as a faux queen (although some consider the label problematic).
shorthand for designated sex at birth.
initialism for Diverse Sexualities and Genders. Sometimes used as a shorthand or umbrella term for non-straight people, as an alternative to Queer or LGBTQ+, etc.
a Polari term of endearment; e.g. “Hello, ducky!”.
a slang term for lesbian (and by connotation, anyone perceived to be one – including bisexual+ women), and commonly a particularly masculine or butch one. Although originally, and still often used in a derogatory manner, it has been reclaimed by many lesbians and sapphic women as a positive term; for example, the lesbian motorcycle group Dykes on Bikes, and various Dyke Marches that take place during Pride events.
a Polari term for face (backslang – literally “face” backwards).
an individual whose mannerisms, behaviours or style may be described as overtly feminine, particularly, but not exclusively, when said individual is a cisgender male.
the capacity that evokes an individual’s desire to engage with emotionally intimate behaviour. Although often conflated with sexual attraction, emotional attraction may be seen by individuals to be distinct from their sexual or romantic attractions.
a slang term for a nonbinary person, taken from the initials ‘n’ and ‘b’.
an individual who is not intersex/does not have an intersex variation. Put simply, an individual whose sex characteristics meet medical or social norms for ‘male‘ and ‘female‘ bodies.
the strive for, and state of, being equal: particularly in status, rights and opportunities in society, regardless of their ascribed demographic. Used in terms such as marriage equality – that is, allowing access to the institution of marriage regardless of the involved people’s sexuality or gender identity.
a major sex hormone produced by the human body, that affects female appearance and sexual development in profound ways, such as those that develop during puberty (secondary sex characteristics).
With transgender and gender non conforming individuals, puberty blockers may be prescribed to prevent the related changes in puberty caused by estrogen in those assigned female at birth. Feminising Hormone Therapy will increase the level of estrogen; Masculinising Hormone Therapy will increase the level of testosterone whilst blocking estrogen hormones.
the deliberate or ongoing process of excluding particular groups of people from something; the opposite of incorporating inclusion.
The institution of marriage was, and still is in many respects and countries, Queer exclusionary: that is, by restricting marriage to opposite-sex couples, Queer people were excluded. Other institutions, such as religious institutions (e.g. churches) also excluded Queer-identified people, deeming them unworthy of participation.
Sadly, there are some groups within the Queer community that are exclusionary; for example, some gay and lesbian groups may be bi-exclusionary, by deeming bisexual+ people as not being “gay enough” to participate; and the increasing rise in trans exclusionary spaces and groups that act in opposition to trans-identified people.
Some Queer spaces have, and continue to, exclude asexual participation, particularly for people on the asexual spectrum who may not be homo or biromantic.
Whilst such exclusionary groups may insist otherwise, the deliberate act of exclusion is, whether by straight or non-straight people, the result of homophobia, biphobia, transphobia, acephobia, etc.
gay slang for an individual who derives pleasure from voyeurism – that is, watching other people having sex or in a state of undress.
shortened version of the insult faggot. Highly problematic and divisive, its usage should be exercised with extreme caution and shouldn’t be used by non-Queer people to describe Queer people. Some Queer people have embraced the word and reclaimed it to some success, using it in pro-Queer propaganda, events, etc.
Fag became a trivial, widely-used insult in general parlance that didn’t necessarily meant to imply a person was Queer, which again became highly problematic.
In the United Kingdom, however, a fag is chiefly used to describe a cigarette.
another term for targeted violence against members of the Queer community.
Related: Queer bashing; gay bashing.
in gay slang, a fag hag is a woman – usually a heterosexual, cisgender woman – who surrounds themselves with gay and bisexual men, such as having friends that are mostly or exclusively men who have sex with men, or spends their time in gay clubs, gay venues and is heavily involved in gay culture.
The term is problematic because it is seen by some as being misogynistic or that it suggests that there is something wrong with heterosexual people involving themselves in the gay scene, thus being exclusionary and stigmatising, and is objected by some for its assumption that such women seek out homosexual and bisexual men as substitutes for romantic partners.
As such, the term fag hag has been used in an insulting sense. However, some women have embraced the term, and it has also been used in an endearing way to describe straight women who involve themselves in gay culture and the scene.
a heterosexual man who usually, or exclusively, surrounds themselves with gay and bisexual men and/or prefers to involve themselves in gay culture and the gay scene. The male equivalent to fag hag.
The term has been used both pejoratively and endearingly.
one of the most offensive slurs used against the Queer community. Its original meaning meant “a bundle of sticks used to start a fire” that began to become a popular, insulting way to describe homosexual and bisexual+ men, particularly in North America; and soon spread to describe anybody Queer as a whole;,including people who are transgender, nonbinary, effeminate men and transvestites – by extension, in then became used against Queer women, gender non-conforming women and butch women.
The term is highly divisive in the Queer community. Some within it absolutely detest the term, comparing it to the most sinister and offensive of racial slurs, whilst others have attempted – to some success – in reclaiming it; such as using it in event titles, support groups, etc.
The term is often shortened to fag. One thing is for sure: it should never be used by non-Queer people to describe Queer people.
an old antigay slur against (particularly, not exclusively) effeminate gay and bisexual men. It has, however, been reclaimed by many in the Queer community, and it isn’t uncommon to see people dressed as fairies at Pride parades.
A Drag King that is a cisgender person assigned male at birth.
The term has been dismissed as irrelevant and problematic by many in the drag community, and should be used with caution, particularly when terms like bio king or male king are used, as it implies that a female-to-male drag king’s male identity is not really ‘male’.
Despite this, many performers adopt and relish the faux identity.
A Drag Queen who is also a cisgender person assigned female at birth.
The term has been dismissed as irrelevant and problematic by many in the drag community, and should be used with caution, particularly when terms like bio queen or female queen are used, as it implies that a male-to-female drag queen’s female identity is not really ‘female’.
A particular example of this controversy is present with RuPaul’s Drag Race, where neither trans women or cisgender women are invited to participate, as they are considered “faux queens” rather than “drag queens”.
Despite this, many performers adopt and relish the faux identity.
a celebrity who claims to be Queer or plays on Queer sexuality or identity in order to court publicity; for example, a straight, female musician that will engage in same-sex erotic activity in a music video to court controversy or publicity, and in the process trivialising Queer identity as being an “outrageous” novelty, rather than a lived experience.
Using Queerness as a marketing ploy is known as Queerbaiting.
an act of oral sex upon a penis and/or testes.
relating to being a woman, women, girl/girls, or femininity, or the qualities of such; for example, female scientists describes scientists who are women.
Female is also a gender identity that may be used in conjunction with other identities (such as a bisexual female, a transgender female, etc), as well as being a classification used for one’s sex assigned at birth.
A nonbinary person may describe themselves as being female-aligned.
In binary sex, individuals are often classified as being either female or male.
a problematic term referring to a faux queen: that is, an assigned-female-at-birth individual who is a drag queen.
See also: bio queen.
a description used by individuals on the nonbinary and transgender gender spectrum to describe individuals that do not identify as female exclusively, but describes a certain alignment towards female identity.
An example may be an agender person that identifies as female-aligned because they were assigned female at birth; or a nonbinary person whose identity is more towards the female end of the spectrum than the male end.
used to describe transgender individuals who were assigned female at birth, but now identify as male. Often seen as M2F.
It may also be used to describe female cross-dressers and tranvestites who dress in a male way.
the female condom; a thin pouch that is inserted into the vagina to prevent semen and other bodily fluids from entering the vagina.
having qualities and attributes traditionally associated with being a woman; possessing traits, behaviours and/or behaviours that are typically associated with the feminine side of the gender spectrum.
Men that possess feminine attributes are known to be effeminate or ‘femme‘; in Queer slang, lesbian and bisexual women that are feminine are known as lipstick lesbians. Women who are more masculine than feminine are known as butch or tomboys.
Femininity and masculinity are social constructs; however, that is not to say that gender is completely constructed or that there are no environmental or biological factors in play, and even as a social construct, concepts of femininity and masculinity aren’t inherently wrong – traditionally, the problem has been that women have been expected to be feminine; femininity was seen as ‘weaker’ than masculinity; people have ascribed false or self-fulfilling traits on femininity (e.g. ascribing rationality and strength as masculine traits, in order to paint femininity as irrational and weak); that femininity was seen as submissive, and masculinity as dominant; and that women who weren’t feminine were portrayed in a negative light and faced prejudice.
Such concepts were used to oppress women into subordinate positions below men, and to paint women as being intellectually incapable: this misogynistic, sexist thinking has traditionally resulted in women being stripped of the right to vote, being relegated to work only as a homemaker or in servitude, and the gender pay gap. Such beliefs still persist in my areas of the world and Western society, traditionally those that are more conservative and/or traditional.
a description for somebody who describes their gender as being more feminine than masculine in terms of how they express their gender.
an identity used to describe individuals who consider themselves to be more feminine than masculine and may encompass a range of other identities (e.g. femme, submissive, transfeminine), but do not describe themselves as women.
a medical intervention of hormone therapy in which medications are prescribed that will reduce the level of testosterone whilst providing estrogen.
the range of social movements and ideologies that strive for equality between men and women, in regards to all facets of life – such as in regards to politics, economics, society and on a personal basis; and to fight for the rights of women within those institutions – some of the key fights that have taken place under feminism are the rights to vote, hold office, their own property and assets, access to education, equal rights within marriage and maternity leave.
It is wrong, however, to assume that feminism is only concerned with the lives of women: indeed, feminism has, and continues to push, for equality that will benefit men too, and to liberate men from the harmful ideals and social norms that are detrimental to them (and, as a result to others too), such as toxic masculinity, the normalisation of house-husbandry (that is, male parents who opt to fulfil the role mothers traditionally filled, for example, being a stay-at-home parent) and parental leave for men.
Feminism has been criticised by both men and women who subscribe to traditional and conservative views (such as those based on religious doctrine), on the basis that it “undervalues” traditional “feminine” aspects (e.g. like motherhood). Although there are fringe movements within the broad church of feminism that may disparage or discourage such things, feminism is typically concerned with giving women the agency to choose.
Other aspects of feminism that have been criticised are that feminism has, at times, been concerned with the concerns of women with privilege: for example, concerned with issues related to white, middle-class, educated, heterosexual and cisgender women; feminism that seeks to address issues that aren’t limited to such perspectives is known as intersectional feminism.
a description for someone identifies themselves to be feminine in some aspect, e.g. physically, mentally or emotionally. Some lesbian and bisexual women will describe themselves as femme rather than butch; similarly, with gay and bisexual men as an alternative to effeminate.
Originated as a Polari term.
a pejorative gay slang term for the children of a closeted, gay male that is married to a woman.
Related: beard
a derogatory slur for homosexuals chiefly used in the United States of America that shares its meaning and origin with the highly-divisive term faggot used against effeminate men. However, the term has also been reclaimed; and is used by flamboyant, out-and-proud effeminate men. Also used as flaming (e.g. a flaming gay).
a term describing effeminate, gay men – related to flamer. By extension, this has become a term describing out-and-proud, flamboyant men who have sex with men.
Originally a pejorative slur, it has also been reclaimed by those it seeked to demonise.
In Queer contexts, a gender identity or sexual orientation in which one’s sense of self or attraction changes dynamically, rather than remains static.
For example, in gender identity, genderflux refers to an individual whose sense of gender identity fluctuates and changes over time. In bisexual+ identities, this could refer to the changing levels of attraction one has over one gender than another; for example, one could find themselves more attracted to one gender than another for a period of time, and find that such levels change on a shifting basis.
One should not consider fluctuating sense of self or attraction as evidence that static, firm identities do not exist, nor should they view them as evidence that non-cishet identities are phases. Just because one’s gender identity or sexual attractions may be fluid, does not mean that everybody else’s are.
Related: fluid.
In Queer contexts, fluid refers to one’s sexual or gender identity in which things change or fluctuate over time; that is, a sexual or gender identity which is not static or fixed, or, that they can be subject to change unexpectedly.
Examples may be genderfluid/genderflux, or various bisexual+ identities. Many people may not realise their fluid identities until they actually experience it; for example, a heterosexual or homosexual person may enter one, or many, bicurious phases throughout their life.
Bisexual+ people may find that their attractions towards certain genders increase or decrease on a fluid basis.
Fluidity should not be confused with bisexuality being a “phase”, nor homosexuality or heterosexuality as something that something that can be changed through intervention; nor should it be considered a “transitional” period between identities; rather, it should be seen as a distinct.
One’s own personal fluidity is not applicable to other sexual and gender identities anymore than any other identity is (e.g. the existence of heterosexuals does not diminish the existence of homosexuals or bisexuals; nor do genderfluid people diminish the existence of transgender or cisgender individuals – and vice versa).
used to describe a non-stagnant identity, for example genderfluid, or a fluid sexuality; the idea that sexualities and genders exist on a spectrum or continuum and may shift over time, and fluctuate.
an identity on the aromantic spectrum, in which the romantic attraction fades once the individual develops a deep connection. As such, it can be seen as a comparable ‘opposite’ to demiromantic.
an identity on the asexual spectrum, in which attraction fades once the individual develops a deep connection. As such, it can be seen as a comparable ‘opposite’ to demisexual.
a gay slang term for a gay man, and more broadly, any Queer-identified person. A euphemism that originates as far back as World War II in the United States, when homosexual acts were illegal – thus, a way of asking about someone’s sexual orientation without being explicit.
used chiefly in America to describe effeminate men, either by calling them “a fruit”, or describing them as fruity.
a predominantly North American slang term for effeminate men, particularly those who are men that have sex with men.
Related: fruit
initialism for female-to-male; used to describe a transgender or transsexual man who was assigned-female-at-birth.
a pejorative term for an individual who has more than one sexually transmitted infection at once.
when individuals take it upon themselves, with no authority whatsoever, to determine who has access or rights to an identity or community, often with a misplaced sense of self-superiority.
An example of Queer gatekeeping would be implying that, for example, bisexuals are not “Queer” or “gay” enough for gay venues or the Queer identity, similarly with asexual people.
Trans gatekeeping may be dismissing the concerns of nonbinary individuals or transgender individuals who have not taken a certain amount of steps (e.g. gender reassignment surgery) for not being “trans enough”.
Binary gatekeeping refers to the act of dismissing transgender, intersex and/or nonbinary individuals’ identities in order to prop up the sex binary.
an individual who is primarily, or solely, attracted to people of the same gender; e.g. gay men and gay women (lesbians) – homosexuals. It is also used – such as in the case of the gay community – to describe LGBT+ people as a collective.
acts of abhorrent, targeted violence against Queer individuals.
Related: fag bashing, Queer bashing
a nightclub venue that caters primarily for Queer people; often incorporating Queer culture.
an umbrella term for the Queer community.
an umbrella term for LGBT/Queer culture; or, relating specifically to homosexual culture.
Like any culture, this is a broad and all-encompassing term that takes into account the many facets of an individuals’ lifestyle that can broadly shared with the rest of the gay/Queer community.
Examples of gay culture would include gay slang – a shared lexicon in the community of which many are familiar; Queer arts, books, television series; gay clubs; gay icons; etc. The rainbow Pride flag is an instantly recognisable gay culture symbol, and Drag is a known as a prominent feature of many gay events, such as Pride.
As well as the broader shared experiences of culture, the various subcultures, such as lesbian, gay (male), bi, trans, etc, have specific cultural identities and features.
an individual, typically a celebrity or famous person, who is held in high regard and/or loved by the gay community. Gay icons aren’t necessarily Queer themselves, in fact, many gay icons are heterosexual and cisgender – but typically, are strong allies (although too, many gay icons only become strong allies after being adopted by as gay icons).
There is no specific set of requirements for a celebrity to become a gay icon; some have been adopted as icons due to their flamboyant or camp style (e.g. Cher, the Spice Girls), or, on the other end, butch style (e.g. k.d. Lang, James Dean) others for singing songs in which the Queer community can adopt (e.g. Lady Gaga’s Poker Face), even if the songs aren’t specifically about Queer sexuality (e.g. Donna Summer’s I’m Coming Out), and songs that have been consistently popular in gay venues.
Similarly across other areas of the entertainment industry, some celebrities have achieved gay icon status for being in films that suggest or can be considered metaphors (however loosely) for Queer themes, love, etc.; Judy Garland is perhaps one of the most famous examples of achieving gay icon status, due to her appearance in The Wizard of Oz.
Other icons, such as German actress Marlene Dietrich achieved gay icon status due to their own sexuality (Dietrich was a bisexual), but also their sense of style – Dietrich was a pioneer in breaking gender norms with her presentation: one of Dietrich’s most famous and celebrated looks is her in a tuxedo and top-hat, which was revolutionary at the time.
Some times, people achieve gay icon status merely for living lives that have relatable experiences to the Queer journey: typically those whose lives have been tragic.
Not at all gay icons embrace the label or status, indeed, some have pushed back against it or have been marred in controversy since (e.g. Donna Summer).
the social and political movement for rights for gay and lesbian people and to counter shame with Pride and self-acceptance. It began with the gay liberation movement of the 1960s-80s, and has continued to the modern day with rights issues such as the equal age of consent and equal marriage.
a male-identified person who is also a homosexual: that is, a male-identified person who is attracted solely, or primarily, to other male-identified people.
a term referring to the marriage of two people of the same gender; often synonymous with marriage equality and same-sex marriage; although, obviously, not all people in a same-sex marriage identify as gay (e.g. in same-sex marriages, one or both could be bisexual).
a place where gay and bisexual men can use saunas and bathing facilities where sexual encounters may occur.
the cultural and social environment that is associated with the gay and Queer community, for example gay clubs, gay venues, etc.
the large lexicon of slang words, euphemisms and terms used by the gay/Queer community to describe all things Queer. Many of which have their origins in using coded language at a time where Queer people and acts were either illegal or taboo; this way, Queer people could identify each other (in much the same way you could identify people from the same region as you by the words they used).
Many are humourous in origin, although a great many are pejorative and/or problematic, arising from self-deprecation.
an individual who is willing to perform homosexual acts for money, even if they are not same-sex attracted themselves.
By extension, it has become a humourous remark in relation to heterosexual actors who play homosexual or bisexual roles.
the intuitive ability to spot another gay person.
initialism for Gender Dysphoria.
Typically conflated with biological sex, gender – broadly – refers to the social and cultural differences between different people, rather than merely anatomical ones. Much as there are numerous genres within art that are defined by characteristics, gender describes the multitude of characteristics in relation to biological sex (or in opposition to it) and the associated behaviours, identities, social/cultural expectations, constructs and classifications.
While the West has traditionally defined human gender to be limited to ‘male’ and ‘female’, other cultures have had more than two.
used to refer to behaviours or interventions that allow transgender and gender non-conforming individuals to be supported and recognised by their gender identity.
A very simple example of gender affirming behaviour is respecting a person’s preferred pronouns and their preferred name.
In Queer health, there are gender affirming medical interventions, such as hormone therapy or gender reassignment surgery.
often initalised to GSM, it is an umbrella term for Queer identified people; those who are not cishet.
a term that gained popularity in the 1980s to describe individuals who were androgynous and/or deliberately played with notions of gender presentation and gender norms. Such individuals were not necessarily cross-dressers or transvestites; nor did they necessarily identify as nonbinary or transgender.
See also: genderfuck.
a prejudice or inclination towards one gender; a form of sexism, gender bias isn’t always conscious or deliberate – it can be the result of social attitudes and values that are distilled into our psychology over time and manifest in ways we may not be aware of. As a result, such attitudes need to be analysed and deliberately challenged both on an individual and group level.
An example of gender bias may be the subconscious idea that when interviewing for a position, the male applicant may be more qualified to do a job than the female applicant, even if on paper, they both have the same qualifications or experience, or that the male applicant is a better option because he won’t take maternity leave.
Gender bias can also be detrimental to men too, however: an example would be the gender bias that values a woman’s role as a housewife and/or principle caregiver of children in the home, whereas for men, househusbandry or being a stay-at-home father is typically looked down upon (especially when compared to stay-at-home mothers), and is faced with prejudice and cultural attitudes that disparage men who take on such roles – and as such, also place prejudicial attitudes upon the women who opt to be the working partner.
Gender bias can also be found in schools – hence why there is a gender gap in STEM subjects (science, technology, engineering and mathematics): because there is a subconscious assumption that male students are more intellectually inclined towards such subjects over females.
the idea that there is only two genders (related to sex) that are male and female, and that everyone is either one or the other. Disputed by many academics in the medical, scientific and psychological fields who make a distinction between sex (of which the idea of there only being ‘two’ binary sexes is disputed too) and gender.
Also known as ‘gender straight‘ or ‘gender normative‘.
Related: gender non-conforming.
a term used by Trans-exclusionary radical feminists to describe their ideology, particularly in an attempt to disassociate themselves as being transphobic; that is, they prefer to say their trans-exclusionary views are based on them being “gender critical”.
a catch-all, umbrella term for those who are not cisgender; that is, those who are transgender, nonbinary and/or gender non-conforming.
a medical term describing the distress an individual feels between their gender identity and their sex assigned at birth. It was previously known as gender identity disorder.
Gender dysphoria is a complicated process that differs from person to person and intensity. Some aspects to gender dysphoria may be more easily assisted than others; for example, the use of preferred pronouns is one small and simple tonic for part of an individual’s gender dysphoria (that is, by using an individual’s preferred pronouns, you alleviate the dysphoria they feel in regards to being referred to the pronouns associated with their sex assigned at birth), similarly with using their preferred name.
An individual assigned male at birth, for example, may experience an intense gender dysphoria when they are masculine presenting (that is, when they look as males are expected to), and find that certain aspects or symptoms of their gender dysphoria are alleviated by being feminine presenting – for example, they feel much more comfortable or ‘themselves’ when they are wearing feminine clothes, make-up, etc, than when they are in a suit and tie and with a beard (this is a very basic example).
Other aspects to a person’s gender dysphoria may be harder to treat, and may require hormone therapy, top surgery or bottom surgery or other medical or cosmetic interventions.
Intense gender dysphoria is associated with transgender and nonbinary individuals.
When left untreated, gender dysphoria can have severe mental health complications for the individual experiencing it.
the external presentation of one’s gender – e.g. through clothing, behaviour, demeanour, etc. Typically referred to in scales of masculinity and femininity in accordance to social/cultural expectations. It is how one presents their gender.
Also known as: gender presentation
the perception of one’s gender internally; how one identifies themselves through their gender/s; how these gender/s exist with regards to their biological sex, and the alignment of these. Often conflated with biological sex.
a medical term previously used until the release of DSM-5 in 2013, now known as gender dysphoria.
gender neutral can mean a variety of things, depending on the context it is given.
As an identity, it may relate to being agender, neutrois or the vast array of gender identities that are wholly or partly without gender.
It also refers to the idea that policies, language and social institutions – such as structures, roles, norms and identities – should avoid distinguishing between genders; in order to prevent discrimination or ascribe gender roles that assert one particular gender is more suited for them than another.
An example of gender neutral language would be to refer to an audience as “people” or “folks” rather than “ladies and gentlemen”; a “police officer” rather than a “policeman” or “policewoman”.
A particular push has been given towards gender neutrality in many areas, particularly when it comes to objects like toys. Traditionally, there have been girls and boys toys, based on ascribed gender traits and marketed as such: for example, boys toys traditionally have been toy guns, cars, etc; whilst girls toys traditionally have been crowns, dolls, etc. However, there has been an increasing push not to separate toys in gender groups, and that toys should be enjoyed by either gender according to their interests; and to prevent ascribing gender roles at an early age.
Increasingly, there is a surge in parents deciding to raise their children in a gender neutral fashion – that is, to raise them without pushing gender norms and roles on them, to allow them to experience and enjoy life away from the ascribed gender binary to reach their potential as individual human beings, rather than to be limited by their biological sex.
also known as neutrois.
a person who identifies outside of the gender binary; also an umbrella term for individuals who do not conform to the traditional ideals and expectations of their gender; a non-traditional gender presentation (e.g. a masculine woman or a feminine man).
somebody whose gender presentation, whether by nature or choice, aligns with the expectations of that gender by their society/culture.
the set of socially defined acceptable and appropriate actions and behaviours for women and men in society, to which the majority of each conform; these are social constructs that define maleness and femaleness, and/or masculinity and femininity, and can vary from culture to culture, and evolve throughout time.
Gender norms are consistently challenged in societies. One example of a once widely-held gender norm that has changed (or, at least, is more commonly challenged) is the gender norm of a woman being a wife and mother that performs the majority of domestic duties.
Gender norms also ascribe certain behaviours and presentations, such as the gender norm that women wear dresses and make-up (whereas men typically don’t). An example of changing gender norms are found in the way one dresses: trousers were once considered the ‘norm’ for men and not women, but this has changed – it’s considered completely normal and acceptable for women to wear trousers.
Related to gender roles.
Also known as gender expression.
surgical or medical procedures in which transgender and nonbinary individuals align their existing sexual characteristics with that of their perceived gender; this may include what is called top or bottom surgery. Part of the treatment for gender dysphoria.
Not to be confused with corrective surgery, in which medical practitioners perform surgery – typically on babies and infants, before they are at an age to consent – to ‘normalise’ intersex variations.
the social and legal process of recognising an individual’s gender identity, for example, the legal ability to change one’s gender on legal documents, like a passport.
This may be the ability to be recognised as male or female when assigned female at birth or assigned male at birth respectively, such as with transgender individuals, or for nonbinary individuals to be recognised as neither male or female if desired.
The term may also relate to the desire of some individuals with intersex variations to be legally recognised as not being either male or female in their sex.
the wide variety of social and cultural expectations in regards to the behaviours and attitudes that are considered acceptable or expected of individuals because of their sex and/or gender.
Closely related to gender norms, gender roles vary between societies and cultures, constantly evolve and have changed throughout history. A prominent example of gender roles in the West that has been challenged, is the idea that a woman‘s role in society is to be a wife and mother first and foremost, and for a man‘s role to be the one that is employed.
These expected gender roles, therefore, have created a society in which a working mother is viewed much differently to a working father, and, equally, a stay-at-home father being viewed much differently to a stay-at-home mother. Because of this, there are many negative stereotypes and cultural attitudes associated with working mothers and stay-at-home fathers respectively; a set of double-standards which do not apply when fathers work and mothers opt to stay at home (for example, that the stay-at-home father is ‘unemployed’ rather than fulfilling a valuable role, or that the working mother is neglecting her mothering duties or ‘missing out’ by working).
This pertinent example further extends to other cultural attitudes which place negative attitudes in regards to expectations: for example, that if a woman lacks the desire to want children, that she is somehow ‘broken’, or that any man who has a strong paternal instinct to raise or work with children is either effeminate, or doing so for some ulterior motive (e.g. a sexual one).
the vast array of gender identities that exist on a continuum between male and female, and in opposition to the idea of gender binary. The idea that gender is complex, consisting of numerous mental, biological and emotional traits.
Agender and genderless identities are still considered to be a part of, and not a rejection of, the gender spectrum; that is, they are identities wholly or partly “off the spectrum“, much like in regards to asexuality and the sexuality spectrum.
Also known as gender normative.
an individual who is not gender conforming. That is, someone who is gender non-conforming; someone who may be transgender, nonbinary, genderqueer etc., by displaying or possessing characteristics that are considered to be different to what is expected of their sex assigned at birth.
However, some people may be perceived to be exhibiting gender variance or gender non-conforming, whilst identifying as cisgender. Individuals who have intersex variations may display characteristics of gender non-conformity, which may only become apparent during puberty.
a dynamic mix between male and female, or masculine and feminine. A genderfluid person may feel to be a mix of masculine/feminine or male/female, on a shifting, fluid scale that may change back and forth or fluctuate over time.
a gender identity in which an individual’s gender identity fluctuates over time, or varies in intensity.
the act of deliberately disrupting, challenging or exaggerating gender norms, presentation and expectation.
Such examples would be to adopt a presentation that incorporates hyper-masculine/hyper-feminine elements – for examples, wearing a beard and having enlarged breasts and makeup.
Genderfuck balls are common examples of events where participants are encouraged to deliberately break-down, ‘fuck with’ and challenge ideas of gender, particularly those that are traditionally ascribed, and those associated with binary sex.
as an identity, it is an alternative term for agender, but can also refer to the vast array of gender identities that are partly genderless or neutral.
Elsewhere, genderless also refers to activities, clothes, traits, etc, that are seen in society as being gender-universal, that is, not prescribed, suited to or exclusive to one particular gender over another – that is, gender neutral.
Increasingly, some people are choosing to raise their children in a genderless/gender neutral way – that is, in a manner that does not prescribe gender norms or expectations.
a gender identity used to describe by people who do not identify as a binary man or woman; also used as an umbrella term for non-conforming or nonbinary identities, for example genderfluid, bigender, agender, etc.
shorthand for Gender Identity Disorder, a term previously used in medical terminology which is now known as gender dysphoria.
gay slang for an extraordinarily tall guy. (Especially pertinent as male giraffes often engage in same-sex sexual behaviours).
an initialism for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender. Used as an umbrella term, but is less common than the abbreviation LGBT.
initialism for gender non-conforming.
short for grey-asexual, otherwise known as greysexual.
alternative to greysexual.
An umbrella term for the various identities on the asexual spectrum that fall between being asexual and being allosexual – that is, “grey” because their sexuality isn’t “black” or “white”.
Such individuals may identify as being greysexual, and/or demisexual.
an individual who experiences aromanticism – that is, little or no romantic attraction to others, but not to the extent of being completely aromantic: they may experience, in some degree or at fluctuating times, a romantic attraction to others, or a romantic attraction under certain circumstances.
This can manifest in a variety of different ways, from experiencing a very weak romantic attraction, experiencing romantic attraction very infrequently, experiencing romantic attraction but not wanting a romantic relationship, or experiencing a form of romantic attraction which is not aligned with the expectations of society and other alloromantic people.
As such, greyromantic is the romantic equivalent of greysexual.
an individual whose sexuality is somewhere on the asexual spectrum between asexual and allosexual; that is, that their asexuality isn’t “black or white”.
As such, grey-asexuality and greysexuals encompasses a wide variety of experiences and therefore definitions.
Demisexual is an example of a greysexual identity, although demisexual is more specific in that it is a lack of sexual attraction except when there is a strong emotional and romantic bond formed; this may not be the case with other greysexual people, whose capacity and potential for sexual attraction may be dependent on something else or different to the demisexual definition.
Can be used in combination with other identities, for example, homoromantic/greysexual.
There is a -romantic equivalent, greyromantic.
a term referring to sexual activity that takes place between three or more people.
Some examples may include orgies, threesomes, swingers parties or sex parties.
initialism for gender and sexual minorities; used as an umbrella term for individuals who are not cisgender and straight; an alternative to Queer or LGBT (etc).
gay slang for a guy who is obsessed or continuously preoccupied with the gym and working out; somebody who is either at the gym or talking about having gone or going to the gym.
An alternative to gynesexual.
an individual who is romantically, but not necessarily sexually attracted, to women and/or femininity. A gyneromantic person may not necessarily be gynesexual.
Gyneromantic individuals may not consider themselves to be homoromantic or heteroromantic, as it may be an attraction to femininity regardless of gender identity, or describe a nonbinary person’s attraction to femininity where homo/hetero labels may not be applicable.
an individual who is primarily attracted – sexually, romantically and/or emotionally – to femininity, feminine expression and/or women, regardless of gender identity or whether they were assigned female at birth, and without reference to one’s own gender identity: as such androsexual people may not be heterosexual or homosexual; for example, an androsexual person may be nonbinary, or attracted to those who are on the “masculine spectrum”, regardless of gender and sex.
Gynesexuality is often used as alternative in the attraction spectrum, where femininity is one end, masculinity on the other, and bisexuality inbetween. Gynesexuality is also sometimes included in the bisexual+ umbrella.
Alternative: gynephilic.
Related: androsexual
a set of pronouns, commonly assigned to men and masculine gender identities.
Some people deliberately choose to avoid using he/him pronouns when discussing people – for example, when discussing potential job applicants; by its very nature, the use of he/him pronouns discloses a person’s gender and may lead to gender bias, and so many use they/them pronouns instead.
Pronoun Usage:
a Polari term of endearment, e.g. “Hello, heartface!”.
an outdated term for an individual who has an intersex variation, typically someone born with the physical characteristics of both men and women, specifically in relation to the genitals and breasts.
In reproductive biology, hermaphrodite is used to describe fauna and flora that has both kinds of reproductive organs, and can produce both gametes associated with male and female sexes – such as those which do not have separate sexes.
A prefix that denotes “other, different”; used to describe sexual and romantic identities, such as heterosexual, heteroromantic.
a bisexual+ identity in which an individual is primarily/mostly heterosexual, but occasionally or rarely experiences some same-gender attraction.
the assumption that everyone is heterosexual, and that heterosexuality is the ‘default’ or ‘norm’; often with the belief that heterosexuality is the superior. It also possesses the attitude that only masculine men and feminine women are straight; and that heterosexual relationships may be the only ones deserving of access to institutions like marriage, law, etc.
Heteronormativity also refers to the ascribed gender roles placed on men and women in a society, and the expectation that men and women should, ideally, conform to them, particularly when it comes to relationships.
Heternormative roles may be place onto individuals in Queer relationships, such as viewing same-gender couples of consisting of a “feminine” and “masculine” one, where one individual – regardless of their sex assigned at birth or gender identity – takes on the “woman’s role” and one takes on the “man’s role”.
An individual who is exclusively or predominantly attracted to members of the opposite sex or gender; but may not be heterosexual.
For example, an asexual person who is heteroromantic.
Somebody who is straight in sexuality, that is not homosexual, bisexual+, asexual. An individual who is primarily, or solely, attracted to people of a different sex or gender, typically the “opposite” one.
However, a heterosexual person may also be biromantic.
Commonly known as straight.
Related: heteroromantic
the romantic and/or sexual attraction and behaviour related to heterosexual individuals and heterosexual acts.
gay slang term for a heterosexual.
a recognised third-gender on the Indian subcontinent, comprised of people who are either eunucs, intersex or transgender. The Hijra go by many other names depending on the language, with a well-documented history.
Many Hijra face discrimination, and during the time of the British Raj (when the Indian subcontinent was colonialised by the British), many Hijra faced persecution and prosecution.
Hijra, as a term, is sometimes rejected by the people it describes in favour of other terms – but nonetheless, it is a cultural term that shouldn’t be applied to, or used by, people outside of that culture.
an initialism of Human Immunodeficiency Virus. It is a type of retrovirus that damages the human immune system: thus, it compromises the body’s ability to fight off illnesses.
As a result, as HIV continues to weaken and damage a person’s immune system, it leads to the development of AIDS. People that have HIV are known to be HIV+. Not all people that are HIV+ also have AIDS; if left untreated, HIV+ typically develop AIDS, but with the help of antiviral treatments, people who are HIV+ are at a far lower risk of developing AIDS as a result.
There is no cure for either HIV or AIDS, however.
HIV is transmitted through certain body liquids: blood, semen, vaginal and anal liquids, and breast milk. It is not transmitted through saliva, tears or sweat, nor can it be spread from hugging, coughing/sneezing, sharing dishes or using the same facilities as someone who is HIV+.
As such, some common ways that HIV is transmitted is through unprotected sexual intercourse; by using needles that may have been used by a person with HIV; from mothers during pregnancy, birth or breastfeeding; or from blood transfusions when blood is used from someone who is HIV+.
As such, safe sex is an important thing to do in order to avoid acquiring or transmitting HIV, and it is important for people not to share or use previously-used needles (to inject drugs, for example). It is also important to ensure that any tattoos you may get are from licensed, trustworthy facilities.
a term referring to subjects relating to both HIV and AIDS. HIV and AIDS are not synonymous terms; HIV is the retrovirus that causes AIDS to develop. Not all people that are HIV+ have AIDS, and people that are on treatment for HIV are far less likely to develop AIDS than those who are untreated.
There is no cure for either HIV or AIDS.
Because of the close relationship between HIV and AIDS, they are often referred to as “HIV/AIDS” together, as medical, social and policy interventions need to take both HIV and AIDS into account.
HIV/AIDS was previously known as GRID: gay-related immune deficiency, as it was thought to be a “gay disease” that only effected men who had sex with men. This was soon shown to be false, however, although the false perception remained for a long time afterwards.
if an individual is HIV+, it means they have HIV in their system (that is, that they are infected with the retrovirus called HIV).
Not all people that are HIV+ have AIDS. However, if left untreated without medication, HIV will weaken you immune system to the point that you will develop AIDS.
an abbreviation of homosexual, referring to people who have sex with people of the same gender – as a result, bisexuals may also be referred to as a “homo“.
The term is problematic due to the term having been used in a pejorative sense against the gay community; however, the term has been reclaimed to some extent and is in use in common Queer parlance.
A prefix used to signify “the same”, typically used in sexual/romantic identities, such as homosexual, homoromantic.
something that evokes arousal or desire towards/for someone, or between people, of the same gender, regardless of their sexuality; or something that depicts or is suggestive of same-gender love, sexual activity, desire or arousal.
Although sometimes used as a synonym for homosexuality, homoeroticism is distinct due to sexual orientation being irrelevant. For example, some people may perceive man-on-man wrestling to be homoerotic, as it involves two men in close proximity, often in little or tight clothes, with their bodies intertwined.
Indeed, many have said that Jesus is depicted in a homoerotic manner in religious artwork, due to being depicted topless with a muscular physique in scant clothing around the waist.
a bisexual+ identity in which an individual is primarily/mostly attracted to people of the same gender, but rarely or occasionally experiences attraction to people of a different gender.
an alternate term to homosexual or gay that rose to prominence in the early start of the gay rights movement – used as preferred term as homosexual was deemed as too clinical, with connotations of being a psychiatric disorder.
However, it fell out of favour by the early 1970s, when gay, lesbian and bisexual became preferred terminology.
It is seldom used now in the English-speaking word (particularly due to the “phile” having connotations related to words such as paedophile), but in some other languages it continues to be the dominant term.
The range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment of homosexuals, homosexuality and therefore, by extension, anyone associated or perceived as being homosexual (and, as such, may include biphobia and transphobia).
Discrimination against gay and Queer people is deep-rooted in society; in much of the world, such attitudes tend to stem from religious teachings, which has led to the criminalisation of homosexuality and homosexual acts, and continues in the form of discrimination.
Someone who possesses homophobia would be described as homophobic.
an individual who possesses homophobia; an adjective that describes attitudes and behaviours that are hostile towards homosexual people, or, by association, the entire gay/Queer community.
An individual who is exclusively, or predominantly, romantically attracted to people of the same sex or gender.
People who are homoromantic may not be homosexual; for example, a bisexual/homoromantic person may be sexually attracted to more than one gender, but only romantically attracted to members of the same gender.
The term is particularly useful to describe asexual people who may be asexual/homoromantic.
More commonly known as gay or lesbian, a homosexual is somebody who is attracted to exclusively, or predominantly, towards people of the same gender or sex.
Many people choose not to use the term homosexual, due to its negative connotations in the past (such as homosexuality being seen as a medical/psychological disorder), and its usage as a negative term.
Related: homophile
the romantic and/or sexual attraction and behaviour between people of the same gender; things related to homosexuals and/or homosexual acts (and therefore, by extension, bisexual+, homoromantic/biromantic individuals).
a term used to describe bisexual males; used in the late 19th century based on a term used at Oxford amongst Lord Byron and his compatriots.
also known as puberty blockers, these help delay unwanted physical changes that occur during puberty, in order to give transgender and gender non-conforming individuals either more time to navigate their gender identity, or, in combination with other hormone therapies, to allow puberty to develop more aligned with their perceived gender.
In TGNC adults, these help prevent the continuous production of testosterone or estrogen whilst on hormone therapy to align their gender identity.
also known as gender-affirming hormone therapy, it is a medical intervention for transgender and gender non-conforming in which hormones are prescribed to help alleviate gender dysphoria and align one’s gender identity.
Typically the medications seek to increase levels of either testosterone or estrogen, and decrease or block the production of estrogen or testosterone respectively.
Hormone therapy is further divided into either Masculinising Hormone Therapy or Feminising Hormone Therapy.
a term referring to a tomboy, or a boisterous, wild and/or untameable woman.
a set of moral principles and guarantees that are seen to be applicable to all human beings, regardless of a particular characteristic – that is, they are the rights awarded to all humans because they are human beings.
a term describing the exaggeration of stereotypical female/feminine behaviour; in Queer contexts, this usually refers to how drag queens use stereotypical female behaviours and appearances to create a character and performance; that is, the deliberate act of exaggerating female/feminine traits for deliberate effect.
In psychological contexts, it may refer to the various behaviours possessed by women that are overtly traditionally feminine, typically with a rejection of traits that are masculine; not simply being a “girly girl” (as in being a feminine female), but actively rejecting masculine traits and norms because of a belief that women shouldn’t possess them.
a term describing the exaggeration of stereotypical male/masculine behaviour; in Queer contexts, this usually refers to how drag kings use stereotypical male behaviours and appearances to create a character and performance; that is, the deliberate act of exaggerating male/masculine traits for deliberate effect.
In psychological contexts, it refers to the various behaviours possessed by men in order to create the appearance of a “macho” personality by rejecting traits considered even remotely feminine, such as believing violence is manly, having casually sexist attitudes towards women, or the attitude that men have to be emotionally hard or indifferent because emotions are ‘girly’ and ‘feminine’.
an individual who displays an unusually high or excessive sex drive, to the extent that it is a problem for either themselves or those they are close with.
having a low sex drive; an autonym to hypersexual.
a Queer slang term for an individual so sweet that you want to lick them.
an acronym for International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, Intersexism and Transphobia.
acronym (often pronounced “Idaho”) for the International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia and Transphobia; originally an abbreviation for International Day Against Homophobia & Transphobia.
The day typically takes place on May 17th each year.
Also known as IDAHO and IDAHOBIT.
how someone sees themselves and wishes to be seen by others; an affiliation to an identity.
In Queer contexts, how one identifies is the the sexual orientation or gender identity that they most associate with, that is, the one they most identify with.
The verb has become commonly associated with transgender and nonbinary individuals; for example, ‘I identify as nonbinary’. But it is also common with sexual orientations, particularly those that are not strictly homosexual or heterosexual, or indeed easily labeled or defined: for example, ‘I identify as Queer, rather than gay or bisexual‘.
who a person is, that is – the various labels one attributes to themselves, or that others attribute to them, to form a picture of themselves; how they identify.
Identity is essential to being Queer; that is, our gender and sexual identities have been identified for and by us, and Queer people have been held to such identities, often in a way that is all-defining (for example, being identified as a homosexual or such term in a negative, stigmatising way; now, the identity of being gay is a matter of pride and a way of others to understand who we are); identity is a large part of one’s gender and identity helps us to understand each other’s sexuality.
a slang term for two effeminate gay/bisexual men who share a close, non-sexual relationship, e.g. best friends.
somebody who has not come out; an individual who has not fully acknowledged their sexual or gender identity publicly. Some people may be in the closet to one group of people (e.g. coworkers), but out to others (e.g. friends and family).
to be inclusive means to provide spaces, resources and systems that are open and fully accessible to everyone, regardless of their identity or particular traits.
An example of this is may be creating Queer spaces that are trans-inclusive. That is, spaces that allow transgender individuals to participate and feel safe without hostility or objection.
This may extend to using language that is inclusive of differing identities; for example, when talking about same-sex attraction, one can be inclusive of bisexual+ people by not referring to all same-gender attracted people as being ‘gay’.
infidelity is the breaking of a promise or assumed commitment to an individual by engaging in sexual or romantic relationships behind a partner’s back – that is, without the other partner’s knowledge.
This is different to open relationships, where one or more of the partners in a relationship agree to allow the other/each other to engage in sexual activity outside of the relationship; or sexual activity between people in committed relationships where people outside of the relationship are invited to join in. It should also not be confused with polyamory, which may be a relationship compromising of three or more people.
the idea held by some gay, lesbian and bisexual people that heterosexuality is the “correct” way to be, and that their own sexuality is immoral or a disorder, which may lead to feelings of self-disgust or self-hatred.
Internalised homophobia may lead to individuals living in the closet or coming out at a late age; living in denial as a heterosexual (in which they may marry and raise families in the hope of being “cured”); seeking dangerous and harmful conversion therapies; disgust and/or contempt for other Queer people, particularly those who are out; denial of homophobia/biphobia in society; unsafe sexual practices with ‘discreet‘ people; mental health issues, substance abuse and obsessive behaviours; and suicide.
It may also lead to more low-levels forms of homophobia, such as wishing to prevent access to Queer people in cultural or social institutions (for example, an aversion to marriage equality), low opinions of other gay/bisexual people (particularly those who are out and proud) or those who are ‘stereotypically’ gay (e.g. effeminate men) – and as such, making yourself sexually unavailable to same-sex attracted people and falling solely for straight people, or even just referring to one’s partner as a “friend” to avoid disclosing a same-sex relationship.
Internalised homophobia may also lead to attitudes that, on the surface, do not appear homophobic: such as an intense dislike of heterosexuals, or a feeling of superiority to them – in itself a reactionary attitude towards the homophobia experienced.
Much like other forms of homophobia, it stems from social, religious and cultural attitudes in which homosexuality is painted in a bad light.
The range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment towards intersex people and people with intersex variations; this may lead to and include intersex erasure and the practice known as “corrective surgery” performed on infants to “normalise” intersex bodies.
Somebody who possesses such beliefs and attitudes can be described as interphobic (or intersexphobic).
Alternate: intersexphobia
somebody whose beliefs and actions display interphobia; actions or beliefs that are hostile or discriminatory towards intersex people/people with intersex variations.
a framework that understands the multiple aspects of an individual’s social and political identities, rather than focusing on them alone; that is, taking numerous factors to identify the numerous advantages and disadvantages that are experienced due to factors (such as sexual orientation, class, gender, ethnicity/race and education).
As such, an intersectional view of Queer identity takes into consideration both Queer sexual and gender identities, and the similarities, the differences how they may relate to one another (e.g. how they overlap).
Another example is intersectional feminism is a form of feminism which concerns itself with the equality and liberation of women with diverse identities (such as those from different backgrounds), rather than focusing on women as a homogeneous group.
an umbrella term for individuals that are born with sexual, reproductive, anatomical or chromosomal traits that are outside of the “typical” male/female sex binary. There is a wide range of intersex variations (previously referred to as ‘disorders of sex development‘).
Individuals with intersex variations have been forced into becoming “anatomically correct” (that is, “typical” by social and medical standards) males or females through invasive, “corrective surgeries“ as infants; for example, surgeries on their genitals to give the appearance typical of men and women. Increasingly, governments across the world are making corrective surgery illegal.
People that have intersex variations have diverse gender identities and sexualities – that is, an intersex individual’s gender or sexual orientation exists distinct from their intersex status. Like endosex people, there are many cisgender and heterosexual individuals, as well as people with intersex variations who identify as being Queer in their gender or sexuality.
the acts and attitudes of ignoring, removing or falsifying intersex people and people with intersex variations and their identity. In its most extreme form, it could be the belief that intersex identity is non-existent, and that people with intersex variations are biological dysfunctions that need “correcting” and “normalising” (e.g. through “corrective surgery“).
Intersex erasure has been commonplace both in society and in the medical community, where the bodies of infant people with intersex variations have been cosmetically altered through surgery to “normalise” their appearance and bodies, rather than to allow intersex individuals agency over their own bodies and identities.
In more subtle forms, intersex erasure could be the act of propagating myths and stereotypes about intersex individuals.
Although it may not involve overt antagonism, intersex erasure is often the result of interphobia. The invisibility and misconceptions of intersex identities, people and topics has a detrimental effect on the health and well-being of individuals with intersex variations.
an alternate term for interphobia, that is, the range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment towards intersex people and people with intersex variations.
alternate term for interphobic.
the closeness between two people in personal relationships, and the connection they feel. Intimacy may be sexual, emotional and/or romantic in nature.
To be intimate is to experience that intimacy with another person; part of which may be physically intimate behaviour.
an individual so far in the closet that it is made of iron; someone who is in deep denial about their sexuality or gender identity that they may never come out.
in reference to sexuality, a kink is an activity that highly arouses an individual, typically an activity that is unusual or atypical in mainstream society; for example, BDSM.
alternatively known as the Heterosexual-Homosexual Rating Scale, was developed by Alfred Kinsey, an American biologist and sexologist, as a way to describe a person’s sexual orientation from 0 to 6. 0 is seen as being exclusively heterosexual, and 6 being exclusively homosexual; 1-5 being degrees of bisexuality between the two extremes. “X” was designated to those who indicated ‘no socio-sexual contacts or reactions’, which can be interpreted as asexuality.
The scale was revolutionary; not only did it contribute to the discussion and study of same-sex attractions, it also gave an identity and acknowledgement to those who were not exclusively heterosexual or homosexual, although Kinsey himself did not use the term “bisexual“, which at the time was popularly used to describe fauna and flora that were hermaphrodites (in the reproductive biological sense of the word). Kinsey did not believe, and his studies gave weight to this, that human sexuality was binary, but on a continuum or spectrum.
a gay slang term for an effeminate male.
a term associated with the Far East to describe a transgender or transsexual woman; typically, but not exclusively, one that has a feminine appearance, has breasts and has a penis.
Due to its association with sex-work and pornography, the term can be problematic for many transsexual and transgender people, although others may wear the identity as a source of pride and defiance.
a gay woman; that is, a woman who solely and/or primarily attracted to people of the same gender – a homosexual female.
The term is derived from the island of Lesbos in Greece, where the poet Sappho – who wrote about same-sex female love – came from.
the concept that lesbian couples experience a decrease in sexual activity after two or so years of being in a relationship. It is based on findings made on a survey in the early 1980s by Philip Blumstein and Pepper Schwartz. The survey claimed that those in same-sex female relationships tended to follow a pattern that the longer the relationship continued, the less sexual activity was experienced, when compared to other couples, including same-sex male couples, opposite-sex couples co-habitating and opposite-sex couples that are married.
However, the study has been criticised as it surrounds ideas about what constitutes as “having sex“, particularly as at the time, and even today, modern discussions surrounding what sex is are usually limited to acts of penetration (that is, vaginal or anal intercourse), and may not have taken into account the vast variety of other sexual or intimate behaviours that take place between couples, and may conflict with studies surrounding differences in female sex satisfaction and orgasms in opposite-sex and same-sex couples (raising the question of whether same-sex female couples outperformed on a “quality vs quantity” basis), or that the results do not extend to considering factors like negative self-esteem and internalised homophobia.
Despite this, lesbian bed death soon became well-known in the Queer lexicon as the subject of dismay and intense debate in lesbian communities, and mockery elsewhere. Some have argued that the pervasive myth around lesbian bed death is due, in part, to lesbophobia.
a woman is who is solely or primarily romantically attracted to other women; a woman who is homoromantic, but not necessarily a homosexual – a woman who is romantically attracted to other women without necessarily being sexually attracted to them, or exclusively sexually attracted to them.
For example, a woman who is asexual/lesbiromantic; or a woman who is bisexual/lesbiromantic.
short for lesbian, it has been used pejoratively in the past but has also been embraced by lesbians in much the same way dyke has. When used prejoratively, it is often applied to any sapphic woman, or someone who is perceived to be a sapphic woman.
the range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment towards lesbian people (and, by association, other sapphic women, such as bisexual women), which may be different to homophobia; such as discrimination, hatred, abuse and/or hostility.
Lesbophobia may differ from homophobia in that it may also encompass sexism and misogyny as well as homophobia, or sexism in spite of homophobia: for example, the belief that same-sex male love is legitimate, “real” or acceptable, but that same-sex female love isn’t.
Lesbophobia, sadly, is not restricted to heterosexual people.
An initialism for lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or transgender. An umbrella term for the Queer community.
an alternative term to Queer culture or gay culture.
An initialism for lesbian, gay, bisexual and/or transgender; with the + used to include other Queer identities. An umbrella term for the Queer community.
An initialism for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, or intersex. An umbrella term for the Queer community.
An initialism standing for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, Queer/questioning, with the “+” sign signifying the various other Queer identities. An umbrella term for the Queer community.
an initialism and umbrella term for the Queer community; lesbian, gay, bisexual, Queer/questioning, asexual/ally – with the “plus” referencing the various other Queer identities.
This is sometimes used to intentionally exclude intersex, such as in discussions about topics or issues in which the intersex community are not involved (such as at the request of the intersex community).
an initialism and umbrella term for the Queer community; lesbian, gay, bisexual, Queer/questioning, intersex, asexual/ally – with the “plus” referencing the various other Queer identities.
Some dispute that the A stands for ally at all.
An initialism standing for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, Queer/questioning, intersex, asexual, aromantic, ally, pansexual with the “+” sign signifying the various other Queer identities. An umbrella term for the Queer community.
Sometimes asexual and ally are combined, or ally is excluded completely to form LGBTQIAP+.
An initialism standing for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, Queer/questioning, intersex, asexual/ally, pansexual with the “+” sign signifying the various other Queer identities. An umbrella term for the Queer community.
Some dispute that the A stands for ally at all.
an initialism and umbrella term for the Queer community; lesbian, gay, bisexual, Queer/questioning, intersex, asexual/ally/aromantic, pansexual/polyamorous, kink.
the acceptance of homosexuality as long as it remains hidden; the idea that one may tolerate or accept same-sex attracted people, as long as they keep it to themselves and any discussion of, or relating to, homosexuality is oppressed.
Such an example is the sentiment that, “I have nothing against gay people, I just don’t know why they have to shove it in our faces” – where essentially, the sentiment is that gay people should exist in the closet, and not live as openly as their heterosexual peers.
a Polari term for the police.
an offensive, pejorative term for Queer men that are effeminate that has come to be used as an insult to gay men as a whole (playing on the stereotype of gay men as effeminate). Reclaimed by some sections of the gay community, whilst others reject the term as they do not want their sexuality to be associated with being effeminate.
a form of sexual attraction on the asexual spectrum in which individuals experience sexual attraction but do not want it to be reciprocated. Lithosexual individuals may feel uncomfortable at the thought of someone being attracted to them and/or feel a decrease in sexual attraction towards somebody when it is reciprocated.
Also known as akoisexual, although that term is nowhere near as prominent.
a form of romantic attraction on the aromantic spectrum in which individuals experience romantic attraction but do not want it to be reciprocated. Lithromantic individuals may feel uncomfortable at the thought of someone being attracted to them and/or feel a decrease in romantic attraction towards somebody when it is reciprocated.
Also known as akoiromantic, although that term is nowhere near as prominent.
in an all-male threesome, the guy who is in the “middle”, who is both giving and receiving.
shorthand for the multisexual spectrum, or multi-gender attraction spectrum, describing the wide variety of bisexual+ identities.
relating to being a man, men, boy/boys, masculinity, or the qualities of such; for example, a male choir is a choir made up of men.
Male is also a gender identity that may also be used in conjunction with other identities (such as a bisexual male, transgender male, etc), as well as being a classification for an individual’s sex assigned at birth.
A nonbinary person may describe themselves as being male-aligned.
In binary sex, individuals are often classified as being either male or female.
a problematic term referring to a faux king: that is, a drag king assigned-male-at-birth.
See also: bio king.
a description used by individuals on the nonbinary and transgender gender spectrum to describe individuals that do not identify as male exclusively, but describes a certain alignment towards male identity.
An example, may be an agender person that identifies as male-aligned because they were assigned male at birth; or a nonbinary person whose identity is more towards the male end of the spectrum than the female end.
used to describe transgender individuals who were assigned male at birth, but now identify as female. Often seen as M2F.
It may also be used to describe male cross-dressers and tranvestites who dress in a female way.
an adult male person; a gender identity, that may also be used in conjunction with other identities – such as a bisexual man, a gay man, an asexual man, etc.
Men typically have male sex characteristics. A cisgender man is a man who was assigned male at birth, a Trans man is a man who was assigned female at birth.
An intersex man is a man who was born with sex characteristics that do not fit typical notions of male biology, and as such, some may have had “corrective surgery” performed on them whilst young to “normalise” their body into being typically male (that is, to look ‘typical’ of what an endosex male body would look like).
However, men may not have typical male sex characteristics, and still be cisgender and endosex (for example, a man who cannot produce sperm).
People who were known to be mwn, and identified as such, may no longer identify as women: such as Trans women, or nonbinary people.
the treatment of a person, or particular group of people, as if they are not important or as important as other groups.
Examples within Queer contexts would be the marginalisation of LGBTQIA+ people in general society by their cishet peers, with their rights considered less significant.
It also takes place within the Queer community – such as the marginalisation of people of colour within various Queer communities, which, as a consequence, has led to their voices, cultures and specific concerns being ignored; others include the erasure of bisexual+ people from Queer discourse (and as such, their health concerns and their identities); the exclusion of asexual people within the Queer umbrella; the lack of voice given to people with intersex variations within the Queer community; the focus on gay male/MSM sexuality and health over lesbian/WSW in academia or media; the anti-trans rhetoric found within some sectors of the Queer community, and indeed, the dismissal of nonbinary individuals by cisgender Queer peopleand other transgender people.
a social/cultural institution in which a union between people is recognised by society and the law. The definitions of marriage vary from culture to culture and have changed throughout time.
In the West, this has typically been a union between two people under the authority of the state representing God, that legally and morally allows for sexual intercourse and family raising (and thus, any sexual activity or children produced outside of marriage as being lesser or even illegal).
The definition of marriage has changed in the West; firstly, it is no longer a requirement for the marriage to be religious in nature or recognised and allowed by any religious institution: these are known as civil marriages. The age of consent for marriage has also changed, as have the legal rights and responsibilities within them: a pertinent example being that a wife is no longer considered a husband’s property through marriage, and no longer does the husband automatically hold all of his wife’s assets.
A major change in marriage occurred throughout many countries in the world when marriage equality was enacted; marriage was no longer restricted to opposite-sex couples.
A cultural variant in marriage also occurs in monogamous and polygamous marriage; many countries in the world allow for (predominantly men) to be married to more than one person; whereas in most countries in the West, this is considered bigamy and is illegal.
the social and political push to allow people of the same gender to be able to marry; and to grant marriage rights to those who are transgender, or legally acknowledged as nonbinary or intersex too, rather than to restrict the right to marry to a couple comprised of a cisgender man and woman.
It’s important to note that it is often referred to by the terms same-sex marriage or gay marriage, but the legality of same-sex marriage does not necessarily mean that there is marriage equality for all (for example, for those who are legally acknowledged as neither male or female, or those who are transgender).
For example, the marriage plebiscite in Australia asked, specifically, if people of the same-sex should be allowed to marry: however, the resulting legislation removed the references to gender altogether, to define marriage as simply being the union of two people.
having qualities and attributes traditionally associated with being a man; possessing traits, behaviours and/or behaviours that are typically associated with the masculine side of the gender spectrum.
Women that possess masculine attributes are known to be butch or tomboys; men with feminine attributes are typically called effeminate or camp. Particularly masculine men may be known as ‘he-men’, although this has also been used with connotations of them being sexist or misogynist, or ‘showy’ in a manner that they seek to prove their masculinity at any opportunity.
Femininity and masculinity are social constructs; however, that is not to say that gender is completely constructed or that there are no environmental or biological factors in play, and even as a social construct, concepts of femininity and masculinity aren’t inherently wrong. Traditionally, in society (and still elsewhere), masculinity was prized over femininity, and with that, men over women.
Such attitudes towards masculinity are known as examples of toxic masculinity.
a description for someone who describes themselves as being more masculine than feminine in the way they present themselves.
an identity used to describe individuals who consider themselves to be more masculine than feminine and may encompass a range of other identities (e.g. butch, dominant, transmasculine), but do not necessarily describe themselves as men.
a medical intervention of hormone therapy in which medications are prescribed that will increase the level of testosterone.
a Polari term for the penis (meat) and testicles (two veg). Has also become common parlance in the general community in the United Kingdom.
often intialised to MSM, it is often used in medical terminology to describe male individuals who engage in intimate behaviour with other men.
It is preferred to using sexuality labels because it is inclusive of the vast array of sexual identities within the sexuality spectrum, and avoids making assumptions of somebody’s sexual orientation (e.g. by assuming an individual is gay, rather than bisexual).
A common alternate term for this is Achillean.
an arrangement in which a married or committed couple live together with the lover of one of them; for example, a husband and wife arrange to allow the husband’s mistress to move in with them.
Has also come to mean a threesome.
in polyamorous relationships, metamour is the name given to your partner’s other partners, with whom you do not share a romantic or sexual relationship with.
a form of bottom gender reassignment surgery in which a series of surgical procedures work with existing genital tissue to form a neophallus (“new penis”). Different from a phalloplasty, which uses grafted skin from elsewhere on the body.
A man, typically a straight man, but not always, who takes a great deal of pride in their appearance; that is, somebody who spends more time, energy, money or effort in keeping up their appearance than is considered normal for men – particularly straight men.
a term that describes a dainty, effeminate walk, stereotypically associated with gay men.
a Polari term for a person’s vulva and pubic hair.
the dislike, contempt or ingrained prejudice against women: it can be as extreme as outright hatred or aversion, or more subtle, such as sexist beliefs or attitudes that consider women to be lesser than men.
Misogynistic thinking may be as explicit as having the belief that women are incapable of self-determination and need men to live a fulfilled life, of lesser intelligence to men, or that they exist in order to serve men or provide certain duties for them (e.g. to provide them with offspring, to provide domestic duties for them, to provide sexual satisfaction to men).
Misogynistic thinking can be a lot more subtle, such as subconsciously underestimating a woman’s ability to do things, which may lead to assuming the male candidate is more equipped or better-able to perform a job (e.g. in a position of power or politics), despite all things being equal; or the objectification of women in which their qualities are based in relation to traits not looked for in men: e.g. their looks or appearance – such as offering a job to a woman because they’re sexually attractive.
a pejorative term in gay slang to describe a bitchy and unlikable homosexual male.
either, the practice of being in a committed relationship with only one person at a time, such as being married to one person at a time; or, the practice of only having one sexual partner at a time.
People who are non-monogamous may be polyamorous, have open relationships, invite other people to join them in their sexual activity, and/or engage in sexual activity outside of the relationship on a recreational basis: though it should be noted, that typically, such relationships work on an open basis, and should not be confused with infidelity.
the assumption that people are monosexual: that is, solely attracted to one gender; the assumption that people are either gay or straight until shown otherwise.
an umbrella term for non-bisexual identities, primarily gay, lesbian or heterosexual.
a gay slang term for an older, but wise or experienced, gay man; somebody who has ” been around the block a few times”.
See also: aunty.
An initialism for men who have sex with men.
An initialism of male to female.
a nonbinary gender identity and umbrella term in which a person describes themselves as having multiple genders, for example, being genderfluid, bigender, polygender, pangender, etc; this is opposed to being agender, cisgender or binary transgender.
an umbrella term for non-monosexual sexualities; an alternative to bisexual+.
Pronounced miks, mucks, or em-ex, Mx. is an alternative title to Mr, Miss, Ms or Mrs that is gender neutral – with the x being a ‘wildcard’; it was proposed in the late 1970s and has since become accepted by the United Kingdom government and many businesses in the sovereign state.
Sometimes, Mx. is pronounced in an extended form as mixter.
a Polari term for a ‘small penis’, literally translated to ‘nothing to see in the pants’.
a Polari term meaning ‘rubbish’. Urban legend has it that it stands for “not available for fucking”. Naff has become common parlance in the United Kingdom by the general population.
a process an individual goes through in order to change the name they are known by socially (e.g. being known to friends and family by a name) and/or legally (e.g. on official records).
Transgender/nonbinary individuals may opt to change their name to better reflect their gender identity; others may opt to change their name for numerous other reasons.
Any previous names are known as deadnames, and the referring to them by their deadname is known as deadnaming: deliberately deadnaming trans and nonbinary people is transphobic, and certainly, referring to anybody by a name in which they do not like is antagonistic and rude.
a broad nonbinary/transgender identity in which individuals have a desire to make a gender neutral presentation; many define neutrois as being different to androgyne because whilst androgynous identities blend or encompass both masculine and feminine characteristics, those who are neutrois possess neither.
a gay slang term based on the term, “queerer than a three-dollar bill”, meaning someone that is extremely and outwardly gay or queer; that is, three times as queerer than the proverbial three-dollar bill.
a phrase used by – predominantly – heterosexual men who make a comment that could be interpreted as being homoerotic or homoromantic, typically to assert their masculinity or heterosexuality.
This could simply be for something as innocent and small as one man complimenting another; for example, “Dude, you look great tonight, no homo”.
The term and the concept behind it is problematic: firstly, it is perhaps an example of toxic masculinity, in which men have to constantly remind each other that they are straight, and that something as simple as a compliment may call their heterosexuality into question. Secondly, it asserts a certain homophobic or biphobic attitude that being seen as same-sex attracted is something to be ashamed of.
in general parlance, it refers to an offer or opportunity made without special conditions or restrictions; in the world of Queer dating, it refers to offers of sexual encounters without any expectations – that is, a casual or one-off hook-up.
a gender identity in which individuals do not identify as being strictly male or female. It is also an umbrella term for a wide variety of gender identities on the gender spectrum which are not strictly male or female; that is, as the name suggests, identities that are not binary.
Nonbinary individuals are typically transgender, as they have transitioned away – in some form – from their sex assigned at birth, although not all nonbinary individuals may identify themselves as such. Many, but not all, nonbinary people have experienced gender dysphoria.
an initialism for ‘no strings attached‘.
in Queer contexts, an individual who is not on a particular spectrum; an asexual individual is ‘off the sexuality spectrum‘, an agender person is ‘off the gender spectrum‘.
a person who experiences romantic, but not necessarily sexual, attractions to all genders. An omniromantic person may not necessarily be omnisexual.
depending on definition, it is either synonymous with pansexual – that is, an attraction to all genders – or, alternatively, it is described as being different to pansexual in that pansexuality is gender-blind attraction to all genders, whereas omnisexuality is gender-conscious attraction to all genders.
Part of the bisexual+ umbrella.
a Polari term meaning “for free”.
a gay slang term for somebody who is looking for a sexual partner.
In other common parlance, it also refers to somebody who is intent on making money via corrupt or unscrupulous means.
a Polari term meaning “alone”, or “by yourself”, which – particularly in the UK – has entered general parlance.
a committed romantic relationship in which either partner are free to engage in sexual activity with other people outside of the relationship. Although open relationships may be polyamorous, not all polyamorous relationships are “open”: that is, in polyamorous relationships between three or people, it is not a given that those within that relationship are free to engage in sexual activity outside of that relationship.
a term describing, predominantly a couple, that are of different genders: typically related to the sex binary, to describe a couple in which one is a man and one is a woman.
sexual activity that involves the stimulation of a person’s genitalia with one’s mouth, lips or teeth.
an orgy is a form of group sex consisting of at least five participants, where the guests engage freely in sexual activity with one another.
in gay slang, an orphan is an individual who has recently been made single.
in the gay community, an otter is someone who is in between a twink and a bear. Typically, a guy who maintains their body hair but leaves some so as not to be classified as a twink.
To be ‘out’ means that someone has publicly disclosed their Queer identity to friends, family, work colleagues, etc.; from the term ‘out of the closet‘ as opposed to being in the closet; and as such, is popularly known as being out and proud, following the process of “coming out“.
However, people can be out in some respects, but not others, e.g. having come out to one’s family and friends, but not their work colleagues.
an individual who is out; that is, someone who does not keep their Queer gender identity or sexuality a secret from others.
This is the opposite to someone who is “in the closet“.
a slang term to describe someone who is out of the closet; that is, someone who is open about their Queer sexuality or gender identity, typically with connotations of being completely unashamed with it, and/or more “open” or expressive about it than the average person may be.
‘Outing’ someone (or ‘to out’ someone) means to publicly reveal someone as being Queer without their consent; e.g. “Marianne outed John as gay to his work colleagues”.
Obviously, nobody should out someone without their permission.
an acronym of “older, wiser lesbian”.
a nonbinary gender identity in which an individual possesses and/or expresses all gender identities, or, possesses all of the broad gender categories: male, female and nonbinary/other.
Pangender individuals may also further describe their gender with other identities, such as genderfluid.
a person who experiences romantic, but not necessarily sexual, attractions to all genders. A panromantic person may not necessarily by pansexual.
A sexual orientation where an individual is attracted to ‘all’ genders, or regardless of gender.
Sometimes synonymous with omnisexual, although a distinction is often drawn that pansexuality is a “gender-blind” attraction to all genders, whereas omnisexuality is a “gender conscious” attraction to all genders.
Some proponents of the term suggest that pansexual is more inclusive than bisexual, because it encompasses, by its definition of “all”, an attraction to transgender and nonbinary people – although this may wrongly suggest that bisexual people’s attractions are limited to cisgender men and women.
Such a distinction is fiercely disputed by many members of the bisexual community, who insist that bisexuality in itself has always been inclusive of nonbinary and transgender people; especially as that before the pansexual identity became prevalent in common parlance, gender non-conforming, nonbinary and transgender people have also identified as bisexual and have been in relationships with bisexual-identified people.
Essentially, it is a personal preference to identify as pansexual or bisexual, and many bisexuals and pansexuals will use the terms interchangeably. Pansexuality falls under the bisexual+ umbrella.
A term used to describe a transgender individual who manages to “pass” as their gender identity; that is, a trans woman who manages to “pass” as a cisgender woman, or a trans man who manages to “pass” as a cisgender man.
However, the use of the term is problematic; particularly as it suggests that a trans person’s worth is dependent on how other people perceive them, based solely on how they look or act.
an old Hollywood term for a straight-acting, traditionally masculine homosexual or bisexual male.
a form of anal sex, in which man‘s anus is penetrated with an artificial penis; typically a strap-on dildo, and typically by a woman or a person without a penis.
a term that expresses disapproval, is insulting, or denigrating. Typically, these come in the form of words used to label a trait or group of people in a negative way.
In Queer contexts, pejorative terms are terms used against Queer people in order to insult them; for example, faggot is a highly pejorative term and a slur.
Some pejorative terms have been reclaimed, however, such as the word gay.
the way one sees their own gender, the way one identifies their gender – which may be different to their sex assigned at birth.
initialism for preferred gender pronouns.
the construction of a neophallus (“new penis”) using grafted skin from elsewhere in the body (usually the forearm); this is different to a metoidioplasty, in which a neophallus is constructed from existing genital tissue.
a term describing physical behaviours that take place between people with a close bond or relationship. Although typically associated with romantic behaviours, such as holding hands, sex and kissing, it also includes behaviours that take place between friends, such as hugging.
gay slang for gay and bisexual males that are hypersexual and into the kinkier and seedier side of gay life.
a form of gay slang and terminology chiefly used in the United Kingdom between members of the Queer community during the 1960s and earlier when homosexuality was illegal; a secretive lexicon of words used by the Queer community. Many of these terms would later enter general slang (such as cottaging), but the vast language in itself has come close to dying out.
An individual who desires relationships with more than one more person; people who are in relationships that involve more than two people – a polyamorous relationship.
Polyamorous people identify as polyamorous, and typically seek out other polyamorous people, or people open to polyamorous relationships (even if they themselves are not polyamorous) to form relationships with.
This is not the same as cheating: polyamory is based on informed consent – that is, that everybody involved in the relationship is aware; this could be an open relationship (where individuals involved are free to explore sexual and/or romantic relationships elsewhere), committed relationships which involve more than two people (e.g. a relationship with and between three people), or relationships in which one or both members have other relationships outside of that relationship.
Polyamorous relationships may be between two (or more) committed people in which both/all/some members engage in recreational or social sexual activity with others (such as swinging).
As such, polyamorous relationships can be diverse.
Not to be confused with polysexual.
the practice or desire for intimate relationships with more than one person, with the informed consent of all partners involved. A form of non-monogamy, people that engage in polyamory are known as polyamorous.
A polyamorous relationship may be a relationship between three or more people which each other, or an open relationship.
This is typically different from swinging (although polyamorous people may also be swingers), where the focus is on sexual activity, rather than deep romantic and/or emotional bonds outside of the relationship.
a nonbinary gender identity in which an individual considers themselves to have, or express, multiple genders.
This is different to being pangender (having or expressing ‘all’ genders), agender (no gender) or bigender (having or expressing two genders, or simultaneously male/female). Polygender individuals may also identify with other nonbinary gender identities, such as being genderqueer or genderflux/genderfluid.
a person who experiences romantic, but not necessarily sexual, attractions to multiple, but not all genders. A panromantic person may not necessarily be polysexual.
A polysexual person is an individual who is attracted to multiple, but not all genders.
Polysexuality falls under the bisexual+ umbrella; and as a result, some bisexuals may further identify as polysexual. Such examples may be individuals who are attracted to nonbinary people and women/femininity, but not men/masculinity.
Within the bisexual+ umbrella, polysexual may describe the distinction between pansexual and non-pansexual bisexuals.
shortened version of poofter, a British equivalent of the word faggot (and, as such, fag). A divisive term that is considered by some to be highly offensive, whilst others have reclaimed it to some success.
a chiefly British antigay slur that is also common in Australia and New Zealand, often shortened to poof; and, particularly in Britain, is seen as severe as the word faggot.
Still, however, the word is in the process of being reclaimed in much of the Queer community, particularly in its shortened form poof; such as the British cover-band 4 Poofs and a Piano who regularly performed on television, and gay events such as “Poof Doofs”.
in a gay slang, a power bottom is a bottom (“the receiver”) during sexual intercourse who is in charge or likes to be dominant.
An individual’s preference for pronouns; e.g. their desire to be referred to as he/him, she/her, they/them, etc.
To deliberately neglect to use a person’s preferred pronouns – that is, to deliberately refer to them using pronouns they do not prefer – is considered transphobic in much the same way deadnaming someone is.
a preconceived opinion or attitude that is not based on reason, particularly towards a group of people – opinions and attitudes that are usually unfavourable (but not always), and as such as discriminatory.
An example of prejudice is to believe that a gay man is, by his very nature, immoral simply because he is gay; or that a transgender individual is mentally ill. Such attitudes become detrimental when they start to influence attitudes in society and its institutions – such as in employment, when job offers may be restricted from such individuals because of these preconceived ideas.
Queer people have faced prejudice in society and continue to do so, and such attitudes manifest into homophobia, lesbophobia, biphobia, transphobia, acephobia, interphobia, etc; that have been detrimental to the health and well-being of Queer people.
In regards to gender expression, it is how one presents oneself; their gender presentation, the outward part of their gender expression.
In Queer contexts (and in many other marginalised communities), this refers to the act of being unashamed.
This is often misunderstood by cishet people to refer to being “proud” in the sense of having achieved something, but it is used as an antonym (that is, an opposite) to shame or social stigma, an act of being out-and-proud. As such, we have Pride parades and festivals.
As such, it is related to promoting Queer agency, dignity, equality and visibility – for Queer people to not merely be hidden away or made taboo.
A flag that represents a particular identity within the Queer community; the most famous – and oldest – Pride flag is the rainbow flag. Since then, numerous Pride flags relating to the different Queer communities have been designed and adopted.
Outdoor events celebrating LGBTQIA+ people, culture and achievements, the push for Queer rights and visibility, and an act of pride (that is, an act in which one is unashamed).
Pride parades (also known as Pride marches) take place all across the world at various times of the year, with many taking place during June to commemorate the 1969 Stonewall riots in New York City – a pivotal moment in Queer history.
A subcategory of nouns that refer to a person or thing – traditionally, he/him, she/her, it/its, they/them.
Traditionally, males are referred to as he/him (e.g. he hurt himself on his table), and females by she/her (e.g. she hurt herself on her table), but the discussion around preferred pronouns has meant that individuals may ask to be referred to by pronouns that are different to what is traditionally expected; transgender individuals may adopt the pronouns of their gender identity (e.g. a woman who was assigned male at birth will ask to be referred to by she/her pronouns), or, in the case of nonbinary people, may wish to be referred to as they/them (e.g. they hurt themself on their table). A wide variety of other nonbinary or gender neutral pronouns also exist.
In the case of some genderqueer/genderflux or nonbinary individuals, as well as Drag Queens and Drag Kings, their pronouns may not be static; that is, depending on how they are presenting, their preferred pronouns may change (e.g. a Drag Queen may be referred to as she/her whilst in Drag, but he/him when not). Other individuals may not have any preference whatsoever.
When unsure, it is best practice to ask an individual which pronouns they prefer. It is considered polite and decent to respect an individual’s preferred pronouns and, aside from genuine mistakes, it is considered transphobic to not respect an individual’s preferred pronouns in much the same way it is to deadname them.
a term referring to hormone blockers, particularly when prescribed to people before or at early puberty in order to give gender non-conforming people more time to navigate their gender identity, and then used in conjunction with other hormone therapies to help align their sexual characteristics with their perceived gender.
In puppy play, a form of roleplay popular in the gay leather community, the pup is the individual who dresses in rubber “pup” gear (e.g. a dog mask, a tail), and is handled by their handler, who roleplays the part of the pup’s owner.
a form of BDSM, popular in the gay leather community, in which individuals role-play being “pups” or their handlers. Similar to other forms of BDSM, there may be a dominant/submissive dynamic to the relationship, even though it is playful – e.g. if the handler says “sit”, the pub will sit.
Puppy play isn’t necessarily sexual in nature – it could be about play or leisure, or like other forms of roleplay, a form of escapism.
An initialism of Queer People of Colour.
a gay slang term for a homosexual male – it was once considered pejorative but has been completely reclaimed, and is often used in combination with other words to describe subcommunities: e.g. drag queens, gym queens, size queens, etc.
An umbrella, catch-all term for LGBTQIA+ people; that is, the Queer Community, those who are not heterosexual and cisgender (“cishet“).
May also be used by people to describe their sexuality in a way that excludes preconceived labels; such as those who feel their sexuality does not fit neatly into prescribed definitions such as gay, lesbian, bisexual+, asexual etc.
In terms of gender identity, it is used typically as genderqueer, with much the same meaning in regards to queer sexuality, that is, one’s gender does not fit neatly into other identities.
Queer was originally used as an insult towards LGBTQIA+ individuals; but has been reclaimed by Queer people – the adjective queer is distinct from Queer with a capital “Q”. It is used in academia to describe various disciplines that relate to Queer topics, such as Queer literature, Queer health, etc.
The term is still considered problematic by some LGBTQIA+ individuals who still see it as a pejorative term; particularly in the United States of America where the word “queer” was used in a particularly hateful manner, such as with Queer bashings.
However, in other countries, particularly in the United Kingdom and Australia, the word has been reclaimed rather successfully (in much the same way gay has), and continues to be used as shorthand/umbrella term for the LGBTQIA+ community.
The abhorrent act of targeted violence or abuse against Queer/LGBTQIA+ people; these targeted acts are the result of homophobia, biphobia and/or transphobia. Also known as gay bashing or fag bashing.
An umbrella term for the various non-cishet identities; refers to Queer people, and synonymous with other terms such as LGBTQIA+.
also known as gay culture, or LGBT culture. It relates to the components of the Queer community in which many Queer identified people can identify. This includes the extensive lexicon of words most familiar to Queer people, rather than straight/cisgender people; Queer arts, literature, movies, music; gay icons; gay clubs; and the various cultures of the subgroups of the Queer community.
An example of Queer culture that has become recognisable outside of it in mainstream culture is Drag.
an umbrella term referring to the various topics and issues relating to the health and well-being of LGBTQIA+ people. Queer people face significant challenges compared to their cishet peers in regards to certain health considerations and health disparities.
It also covers the wide array of services Queer people may need, for example, specialist services for transgender individuals, as well as mental health services and community services that are built to include Queer-identified individuals – for example, mental health services and domestic violence services that take into account the added challenges and considerations needed when dealing with Queer-identified people.
an umbrella term to refer to Queer-identified individuals who also identify as men; although commonly, the term is used to describe gay and bisexual+ men.
an alternate term to gay slang, that is the large lexicon of slang terms and euphemisms that are used by the Queer community to describe all things Queer.
an umbrella term to refer to Queer-identified individuals who also identify as women; although commonly, the term is used to describe gay and bisexual+ women.
in entertainment, it is the practice of hinting at same-sex romance or attraction without actually depicting it. For example, a television series in which two male characters form a close bond where there are sexual or romantic connotations or suggestions, but the romance or sexual element is never actually developed.
Celebrities have been accused of queerbaiting, too – that is, using Queer identity and love as a marketing technique: one such example may be a heterosexual singer that sings about being interested in somebody of the same gender, or being suggestive with other people of the same gender in music videos or performances – essentially, being Queer for show (also known as being a fauxmosexual).
Using Queer identity as a marketing technique trivialises Queer identities, particularly when it happens at the hands of cishet people who have very little knowledge of the experiences and journeys of Queer people; particularly when heterosexual entertainers play with the idea of being bicurious or bisexual as a ploy or marketing technique (or indeed, to appeal to LGBT+ fans), it further encourages the biphobic idea that bisexuality isn’t a legitimate, real orientation, and merely a fashionable fad.
Of course, being suggestive rather than explicit also happens between opposite-sex characters, and it is a form of dramatic tension in narrative arcs; and so not all examples of sexual or romantic tension between characters is, in itself, a deliberate act of Queerbaiting.
An individual who is currently in the process of exploring their sexuality and/or gender identity. Somebody who is still unsure about whether or not they are Queer or not. In terms of sexuality, they may be described as bicurious.
An alternative to LGBTQIA+, but far less common, it is an acronym of Queer/Questioning, Undecided, Intersex, Lesbian, Transgender, Bisexual, Asexual, Gay/Genderqueer.
a meteorological phenomenon that has become widely recognised as a symbol of Queer Pride and social movements, due to the rainbow Pride Flag.
As a result, “rainbow” has been used to describe various Queer-related concepts; such as “Rainbow Family“.
A term relating to families in which the parent/s identify as Queer; that is, when at least one parent is LGBTQIA+ identified. Some examples are when a parent is transgender, or a family where the parents are a same-sex couple.
Not all rainbow families are immediately identifiable, for example, one or more parents could be bisexual+.
in a linguistic sense, reappropriation refers to taking a word once used to denigrate a group (a pejorative term or slur) or demographic, and to reclaim it as a term of a pride. The most obvious example of this within the Queer community is the word Queer itself: once used (and in some parts of the word, still is) to insult and humiliate LGBTQIA+ people, it is has been successfully reclaimed to become a prominent and preferred catch-all term for the community; even to the extent of being academic – e.g. Queer literature, Queer film festivals, etc.
an identity on the aromantic spectrum, in which an individual does not experience a romantic attraction to someone else until they’re aware that someone is romantically attracted to them. Reciproromantic individuals may – or may not – be reciprosexual.
an identity under the asexual umbrella, in which an individual does not experience attraction until they’re aware somebody is attracted to them first. Reciprosexual individuals may, or may not, also be reciproromantic.
in culture and linguists, a word that was once considered a slur to denigrate a demographic, that is now used as a term of empowerment, for example, the words gay and Queer.
Even though the words may be reclaimed, they may still prove controversial (as with Queer). Other words may be partially reclaimed, such as the words dyke or poof where it is considered inappropriate for – particularly – cishet (non Queer) people to use, and should be used with caution by those who are Queer.
the way two or more people feel and behave towards each other; typically, this describes a close bond – romantic, emotional or sexual – between people, such as the term “in a relationship”.
an alternate term for conversion therapy.
the legal, social and ethical principles of freedom or entitlement; that is, what people are allowed or owed in society.
Some rights are considered inalienable human rights – that is, that they should be guaranteed to all human beings regardless.
Rights have often had to be won because they have not been guaranteed: for example, the right to marry for couples regardless of gender; or the right to have one’s gender officially recognised when it differs from sex assigned at birth. The fight to for one group to have the same rights other groups have is known as a fight for equal rights.
gay slang; a sexually-active man who has sex with men, particularly one who is the top (the “giver”).
The capacity one has for romantic attractions towards others, which may or may not be aligned with their sexual attraction.
For example, an individual may be sexually attracted to more than one gender, but romantically attracted to only one (e.g. bisexual/heteroromantic).
Asexual people may describe themselves as being asexual but homoromantic, for example.
slang for condom, also used separately as ‘rubbers’ or ‘johnnies’.
gay slang for homosexual sex between men, a play-on-words from the euphemism for sex which is rumpy-pumpy.
Related: bumper to bumper
An initialism for sex assigned at birth.
the variety of methods or devices used to reduce the risks associated with sexual activity; such as using condoms to prevent the risk of acquiring or transmitting sexually transmitted infections, like HIV and other risks such as pregnancy (although most forms of birth control do not protect against STIs).
a place or environment in which a member of a marginalised group can enter without fear of being discriminated, harassed or harmed.
For example, a Queer safe space is a place where LGBTQIA+ can feel safe and confident about being themselves, without their sexuality and/or gender identity being a problem or issue for the other people there.
an umbrella term for individuals who attracted in some way to people of the same gender. Including, but not limited to, gay and lesbian people, bisexual+ people, and those on the asexual spectrum who are romantically attracted to people of the same gender, e.g. homoromantic, biromantic.
An alternative to same-sex attracted.
a term describing, predominantly a couple, that are of the same gender, and typically related to the sex binary to describe a couple in which both partners are either male or female; e.g. a same-sex relationship, same-sex marriage.
an umbrella term to describe people that are attracted, in some way, to other individuals of the same sex or gender; included, but not limited to, gay people, bisexual+ people, bicurious people, and people on the asexual spectrum that also have romantic attractions rather than sexual ones, e.g. homoromantic, biromantic, etc.
a term referring to the marriage of two people of the same sex or gender; often called gay marriage, and the push for it is referred to as marriage equality.
an umbrella term for same-gender loving women or woman-aligned people, such as lesbians and bisexual+ women; an alternative to terms such as women who have sex with women, and used to describe the topics, activities and ideas around it: for example, sapphic relations, sapphic people, sapphic literature.
Queer slang term for homosexual or bisexual men that enjoy the company of lesbians.
a slang term for lesbians who are closeted and present themselves as heterosexual during the week (such as at work, or to family and friends) but frequent lesbian venues at the weekend.
an acronym for sex coercively assigned at birth.
a Yiddish term for a person of Chinese descent, adopted into Polari slang to describe a Chinese man. Highly offensive.
a Yiddish slur for a black person, that was adopted into Polari as a slang term for a black man. Highly offensive.
A term related to transgender individuals who go through hormone therapy, essentially starting what is known as a second puberty where hormonal changes take place within the body.
In medical circles, second puberty may also be used to describe the various hormonal changes that take place without hormone therapy that take place as a natural (that is, without medical intervention) part of aging.
in general, self-identification refers to being able to identify yourself with a group, community or label.
In the context of transgender identities, it refers to the ability of individuals who are transgender to identify with their gender identity without the approval of the various legal and medical authorities, such as the ability to identify as a man or a woman (or indeed, the various agender or nonbinary identities) without approval, or the prerequisite of gender reassignment surgery; in much the same way one has the agency to define their sexuality without medical approval.
Self-identification in the transgender community has proved controversial and raised concerns amongst some people; but it has also become a rallying-cry amongst transphobic people who attempt to use it in an alarmist way by inventing extreme scenarios.
Sex may refer to:
Often a shortened way of referring to biological sex; that is, the sex assigned at birth – although often conflated with gender.
Or, the vast array of activities related to physically intimate behaviour. One should not restrict sex into only being penetrative (e.g. vaginal sex, anal sex). Sex is (perhaps viewed ideally) the activities that take place between two (or more) consenting individuals with the intention of evoking physical, emotional and/or romantic gratification; intimate pleasure; or, in some cases, merely an act of procreation used for reproduction.
The sex assigned to an individual when born; that is, typically, male or female as it may appear on one’s birth certificate.
A transgender individual is somebody who identifies their gender differently to their sex assigned at birth. By comparison, someone whose sex assigned at birth is the same as their gender (that is, their sex and gender are aligned) is considered cisgender.
It should be noted, however, that medical professionals are increasingly recognising those born with intersex variations, and may mark documents such as birth certificates as ‘X’ or ‘indeterminate’ – however, this should not be taken to mean that all people with intersex variations are of an indeterminate sex: it is common for intersex people to identify with their sex assigned at birth (male or female). A further issue presented in regards to people with intersex variations and sex assigned at birth is the issue of so-called ‘corrective surgery‘, in which medical practitioners conduct unnecessary, often cosmetic, surgery on intersex infants to ‘normalise’ their bodies to look more typically male or female.
Also known as designated sex at birth (DSAB), sex coercively assigned at birth (SCAB).
Related: assigned male at birth (AMAB), assigned female at birth (AFAB).
also known as the gender binary or binary sex; it is the idea that there is only two genders (related to sex) that are male and female, and that everyone is either one or the other. Heavily disputed.
a term referring to gender reassignment surgery, particularly those related to medical/cosmetic surgeries (“top” and “bottom“) surgery.
the wide variety of characteristics, predominantly physical, but also behavioural, which provide indicators of one’s biological sex. Endosex individuals have sex characteristics typical of either males or females, whereas intersex individuals (that is, people with intersex variations) may have any number of sex characteristics which may not be identifiable as “typical” for males and females, or possess sex characteristics which are “typically” not all-male or all-female; that is, they may have, for example, a majority of “typical” female sex characteristics, but one or more “typical” male sex characteristics.
The use of the word “typical” or “usual” is important in this respect, because sex characteristics are based on exactly that; there are endosex individuals who may not possess a particular sex characteristic; this does not necessarily make them intersex, nor does it mean they are not men or women.
Sex characteristics are typically defined as “primary” and “secondary”, with “primary” sex characteristics being those an individual are born with, and “secondary” sex characteristics occurring during puberty. Primary sex characteristics can be further divided into relating to gonads, chromosomes, sex hormones, internal and external genitalia, and secondary sex characteristics relating to typical physical features.
Our current definitions of typical sex characteristics is based on what is immediately visible, or what has been determined through the use of medical technology (e.g. chromosomes); there could be other sex characteristics typical of men and women which are yet to be defined, and there are sex characteristics which are typical which are not essential: for example, one example of a sex characteristic typical in men is a deeper voice that develops in puberty – it does not mean a deeper voice is essential for being a man, nor that a woman who possesses a deep voice is therefore a man.
The wide variety of “typical” or usual sex characteristics which are to be considered in biological sex has began to be seen in many scientific circles as being on a spectrum, rather than on a simplistic binary, and distinct from constructs of gender, although related.
often initialised to SCAB, it refers to the sex assigned at birth, and sometimes used by intersex people to refer to one of the two biological sexes they were forced into adopting at birth.
The term is very specific to intersex people, because it relates to the coercion they faced as infants, such as having to undergo “corrective surgery” in order to appear as a “normal” man or woman – in part to erase their intersex status.
an event in which numerous individuals gather for the purpose of engaging in sexual activity with one another; such as an orgy or a swingers party.
An alternative to the now-preferred and often used gender reassignment surgery.
the prejudice, stereotyping or discrimination against someone based on their sex or gender; primarily (but not exclusively) against women.
An individual who possesses such attitudes and behaviours would be described as sexist.
an individual who possesses attitudes and behaviours that espouse sexism; an adjective describing such attitudes and behaviours.
any activity that is sexual in nature: that is, an activity which induces sexual arousal and pleasure.
The capacity an individual has for sexual attraction towards others; the attraction one feels towards another for physically intimate behaviour; it may be experienced in varying degrees, such as an intense attraction, a little attraction or no attraction (e.g. asexual).
This may be aligned with an individual’s romantic or emotional attraction, or may not – such as individuals who may be sexually attracted to two or many genders, but only romantically attracted to one (e.g. bisexual/heteroromantic).
the motivation or want to engage in sexual activity; also known as a person’s libido or sex drive, it forms part of one’s sexuality. Sexual desire is typically triggered, spontaneously or in response – for example, by one’s own imagination or thought, or by something happening in their environment (for example, encountering someone that they are sexually attracted to).
If an individual has no or little sexual desire, they may be asexual, although a person’s level of sexual desire may vary through time or be dependent on other circumstances or their health.
the idea that one’s sexual orientation may change during one’s lifetime – without intervention – perhaps unexpectedly. For example, somebody who identifies as heterosexual may, unexpectedly, develop a sexual or romantic interest in someone of the same gender. This doesn’t necessarily mean they are bisexual, or even bicurious.
It may also refer to the fluctuation in sexual or romantic attraction in bisexual+ people towards and away from one or more genders; although not necessarily to any extent where they may consider themselves monosexual.
alternative to sexual orientation.
a sexual act that involves penetration; e.g. a penis, or a sex toy, being inserted into a vagina or anus.
Used to describe the sexual, romantic, and/or emotional attraction one feels for others; that is, the relationship between a person and the people they are attracted to. Often conflated, wrongly, with sexual preference.
An individual’s sexual orientation, however, may be different from their romantic orientation; such as in the case with people who may be bisexual but hetero/homoromantic.
The insidious practices enacted by homophobic, biphobic and transphobic groups and organisations that claim to “cure” people of their Queerness. Such practices are pseudo-scientific, and often have long-lasting and damaging implications, for example, PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder), anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation. There is absolutely no medical or scientific evidence that such practices work.
There are a wide range of “conversion therapy” (also known as “reparative therapy”) practices used in order to “cure” people of their LGBTQIA+ status. Traditionally, these have included practices such as electro-shock therapy or corrective rape (that is, where individuals are forced to engage in heterosexual sex). Other methods that are commonly portrayed are conversion camps, where people are sent away to be intensively “trained” to be cisgender and heterosexual.
It also includes some more subtle methods, such as with ‘spiritual intervention’, where people are told they can “pray the gay away” through religious devotion and abstinence from homosexual behaviours or expressions of gender that are not considered ‘consistent’ with traditional gender roles.
Many countries have acted on advice from medical authorities and taken steps to make conversion therapies illegal, based on the damaging effect they have on people’s mental health and wellbeing, particularly as these forms of practices are most often led by individuals with no certified or reputable training in the areas of psychology or psychiatry.
Many defenders of these kinds of practices have attempted to distance spiritual or religious interventions from “conversion therapy”, or to portray their methods as being available to consenting adults who have “unwanted sexual attractions or gender identities”: however, most often homophobia and transphobia are often the root cause of such individuals wishing to be ‘converted’, or may be the result of anti-Queer church teachings that effectively put individuals in a position where they have to choose between their faith and their sexuality/gender identity.
An individual’s preference in the types of sexual intercourse, stimulation and gratification that they like to receive or participate in; often mistakenly conflated with sexual orientation. A problematic term in regards to Queer sexuality as it may suggest it is a choice (preference).
one’s capacity for sexual, romantic or emotional attractions and feelings; in Queer contexts, this typically refers to the gender(s) to which one is attracted (e.g. -sexual, -romantic) – the varying aspects that make up our ability (or lack thereof) to be attracted to others.
a spectrum of sexual orientation, with heterosexual on one extreme and homosexual on the other, with bisexual+ identities between; one such example of the sexuality spectrum is the Kinsey Scale. Asexual people would be described as being ‘off the spectrum‘ in this regard.
Put simply, it is the wide range of allosexual sexual identities.
a term that is used in medicine particularly, to describe individuals who have engaged in sexual activity; this is not simply vaginal penetrative sex, but includes oral and anal sex, and other sexual behaviours such as manual sex (hand jobs, fingering, etc).
The term is vague and can be misinterpreted: an individual who has had sex before but hasn’t for a while may not see themselves as “sexually active”, but this is wrong. When a doctor asks you if you are sexually active, it is on the basis that they can rule out or consider sexual-related concerns in your diagnosis, such as STIs, or in order to offer contraception.
Put simply, if you’ve ever engaged in sexual behaviour, you are sexually active.
now typically referred to as a sexually transmitted infection.
shortened to STI, and previously commonly referred to as a sexually transmitted disease. STIs are infections that are commonly spread through sexual activity, particularly vaginal, anal and oral sex, and are either bacterial STIs, viral STIs or parasitic STIs.
Many STIs do not have immediate symptoms, which means they can be at risk of being passed on to others as the carrier may not be aware they have an STI. Signs and symptoms of an STI may include vaginal or penile discharge, ulcers around or on the genitals and pelvic pain.
If left untreated, STIs can cause serious health complications and can also be passed onto infants before or during childbirth.
As a result, it is important to practice safe sex.
initialism of same-gender loving, used as an umbrella term for individuals/communities that are homosexual, bisexual+, homo/biromantic, etc; essentially, those who are Queer in sexuality, and may or may not include asexual people.
a Polari term meaning to “get up” or “wake up” – literally, “shakes out of his bed”.
a set of pronouns, commonly assigned to women and feminine gender identities; and also, jokingly, used in gay slang by gay/bi men to refer to other gay/bi men.
Some people deliberately choose to avoid using she/her pronouns when discussing people – for example, when discussing potential job applicants; by its very nature, the use of she/her pronouns discloses a person’s gender and may lead to gender bias, and so many use they/them pronouns instead.
Pronoun Usage:
a set of gender neutral pronouns, although far less common than they/them. Nonbinary individuals may opt for the sie/hir pronouns instead of he/him or she/her.
Sie is pronounced as “see”. Hir is pronounced like “here”.
It is related to ze/zir, and the pronouns may be used in combination, e.g. “ze/hir” or “sie/zir”, rather than “sie/hir” or “ze/zir”.
Pronoun Usage:
a culturally specific term in Australian Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander lexicon to refer to transgender, nonbinary and other gender diverse individuals who have a ‘female‘ spirit and take on female roles within the community.
an individual who is primarily or exclusively attracted to nonbinary and/or transgender individuals – essentially, an attraction to individuals who are not cisgender, although not necessarily all gender identities.
However, the term may be considered problematic as the term comes from the Greek for “crooked” or “curved”, suggesting non-cisgender people are broken; whilst others too have pointed out it may ‘other’ Trans men and women as not being true men and women.
Further, some have argued that the label may suggest a fetish, rather than an attraction – although this has also been disputed by non-cisgender individuals too.
For example, a skoliosexual person may be solely or primarily attracted to genderqueer individuals in much the same way gay men are attracted to other gay men.
a remark or term that criticises someone to an extent of wanting to, or likely to, have a harmful effect on their reputation; typically a term that is pejorative.
As such, it has come to mean a term that does not pay any respect whatsoever to the person they have come to describe, a term that is used with the intent of being insulted.
in gay slang, an alternative term for a “twink“, albeit with a more pejorative twinge, implying a bitchy demeanour.
a term in sociology to describe something that is created, defined and/or ascribed by society; and as such, may or may not be universal. An example of a social construct is money; money does not exist without the social defining of its value and worth.
Gender is a social construct: this doesn’t mean that gender does not exist (just as money does not exist), and as such, understandings and definitions of gender can be cultural, which is why many different descriptions and gender identities have existed throughout time and from culture to culture; and as such the associated gender norms and expectations are also social constructs.
particular sets of beliefs and attitudes as to how people should appear or behave, that differ between societies and cultures; what they perceived to be “expected”, and thus “normal”.
Examples include the social/cultural expectations of women to have children, or for individuals to be heterosexual rather than homosexual/bisexual+/asexual.
Defying such expectations may result in stigma and discrimination.
short for sodomite, the term is primarily used in Britain but not usually to describe homosexuals. Although it started off as an anti-gay slur, sod in general parlance has many different meanings, often used as a milder substitute for the word fuck or twat (e.g. “sod off”, “sod all”, “cheeky sod”).
a term for a gay man or anyone suspected of practising sodomy – which extends to any form of sex that isn’t vaginal between a man and a woman; however, typically, it was only men who had sex with other men that were prosecuted under sodomy laws.
typically refers to anal sex, equivalent to the word buggery, although sodomy also extended to anything that wasn’t vaginal intercourse, including heterosexual oral sex. Sodomy was a crime in much of the world in the past, and in some places still is.
The word comes from the Biblical tale of Sodom and Gomorrah.
Acronym for Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity Change Efforts, also known as “conversion therapy“.
in Queer contexts, the spectrum refers to the wide variety of identities that fall between two binary or “extreme” points.
An example would be the sexuality spectrum (as exampled by the Kinsey scale), with homosexual on one end, heterosexual on the other, and bisexual+ identities falling somewhere in between (and asexual identities, in this respect, being off the spectrum).
In the gender spectrum, one might look at female and male being at either end, with nonbinary identities falling in between (and agender being off the spectrum). Trans men and trans women may see themselves as being on either end of that spectrum.
Another example is the asexual spectrum, which covers the wide variety of asexual identities within it; one “extreme” point at one end may be asexuality/aromanticism, on the other, allosexual.
It is important to note, however, that the term spectrum on its own – particularly, when used in the context as being “on the spectrum” – has become synonymous with the autistim spectrum.
an initialism of sex reassignment surgery; now most usually referred to as gender reassignment surgery.
an initialism of sexually transmitted disease, although the preferred terminology is now sexually transmitted infection (STI).
A trans person who is not out. That is, a trans person who is still perceived or known by others as being cisgender.
an initialism of sexually transmitted infection.
the process of making a particular trait or label one with negative connotations, in such a way that a person is judged by that trait and label unfairly, without regard to any other aspect of their personality or ability. Stigma results in people feeling shame about who they are.
Stigma has played a large part in the mental health of Queer-identified people; society has stigmatised Queer sexuality and gender identity by referring to it as a mental illness and a perversion, and as such, a wide variety of negative connotations are associated with Queer identity – such as labeling Queer people as psychopathic, sexual predators that are a risk to people’s safety.
Religion has often stigmatised Queer sexuality and gender, such as referring to it as a sin, and therefore, an ungodly act for which Queer people should be ashamed, shunned or cured of (leading to abhorrent practices like conversion therapy).
a slang term that emerged to describe highly-masculine, butch lesbian women. Emerged from the 1993 novel Stone Butch Blues by Leslie Feinberg, herself a butch lesbian.
a pivotal event in Queer rights, ‘Stonewall’ refers to the Stonewall riots/uprising/rebellion of June 1969 at the Stonewall Inn, New York City, in which members of the Queer community fought back against police that became violent during a police raid (same-sex activity was illegal at the time).
This refusal to be victimised by an anti-Queer legal system and police force became a major event in the American fight for LGBT rights in the United States.
Although in other places, such as countries in Western Europe, same-sex activity was legal, it also had a profound effect in such places where Queer people were still stigmatised and had less rights, and is seen as a precursor for Pride Parades that occur across the world.
A more colloquial and common word for people who are heterosexual; the word stems from being the antonym to bent, that is – straight refers to somebody who is not homosexual, bisexual and/or same-sex attracted.
Can also be seen as the antonym to Queer; and as such, is used to describe people who are primarily heterosexual and cisgender (“cishet“); although, transgender individuals may describe themselves as being straight (that is, heterosexual).
A term used to describe a non-straight person who acts, or is perceived to be, straight. Typically used in relation to gay and bisexual men that are not ‘obviously’ gay or bisexual, that are gender conforming and would generally be mistaken as being ‘straight’ by others – particularly in regards to mannerisms, behaviours and presentations that are typical of straight males.
A heterosexual and/or cisgender ally to the Queer community.
Now typically used to describe somebody who is both heterosexual and cisgender (cishet) but supportive of the Queer community; an individual who does not identify as Queer/LGBTQIAP+ but recognises and works towards fixing the discrimination, health issues and acceptance of Queer/LGBTQIAP+ peoples.
A cishet person who is a straight ally; a play-on-words that means one is straight, but not narrow minded.
as opposed to dominant, it describes somebody in a sexual relationship who prefers to be the bottom and not the top; that is, the one who ‘receives’ rather than ‘gives’ during sexual intercourse (although a power bottom is somebody who ‘receives’ and is also dominant).
In the BDSM kink, the submissive partner is the one who takes on the role of being ‘controlled’ and be obedient, rather than taking on the role of the master who does the controlling.
a swinger is somebody who engages in swinging; that is, a lifestyle in which people in committed relationships engage in casual sexual acts with other people, often but not always, with other people also in relationships.
It is not to be confused with polyamory.
also known as a partner-swapping party, a swinger party is an event in which swingers can engage in sexual activity with others as a social or recreational activity.
a term referring to people in committed relationships, where typically both individuals within said relationship also enjoy casual sex with other people, typically, but not exclusively, with other people in committed relationships that are also into swinging. People who enjoy swinging are known as swingers.
Swinging is a form of open relationship and non-monogamy that should not be confused with polyamory. Although polyamorous relationships may also engage in swinging, the key difference between polyamory and swinging is that swinging is not based on seeking out love: although swingers may enjoy loving and affectionate bonds with those they swing with, it is not about seeking out committed, romantic and/or emotional bonds with more than one person (as in polyamory), as much as it is seeking out sexual activity. It is not seeking out an extension to the current relationship or an extra participant in the relationship; the committed relationship is separate from the sexual relationship enjoyed with other people.
For this reason, it has also been commonly known as wife swapping, husband swapping or partner swapping.
a Polari term for someone who is a prostitute, and by association, someone is who sexually promiscuous. Has become common parlance in the United Kingdom, where it is also used to describe someone who is dressed up, particularly in a showy or suggestive way – e.g. “tart yourself up”.
an acronym for Trans-exclusionary radical feminist.
Although TERFs consider “TERF” a slur, and prefer to be known as “gender critical”, the views they espouse are evidently transphobic, often denying transgender and nonbinary identities on the basis of the sex binary, and to insist that the recognition of Trans women is an attempt to erase lesbian identity (with rhetoric often similar to Bi-exclusionary discourse too).
As with other forms of bigotry, such arguments often (but not always) rely on worst-case scenarios, slippery-slope arguments, hearsay and extreme examples; such arguments that once upon a time (and still are) in homophobic discourse to deny rights to lesbian and gay people, and are arguments that they’d object to on much the same grounds as transgender people and their allies do with their rhetoric.
For example, there is a painting of Trans women as predators who are seeking on gaining access to women’s bathrooms, domestic violence shelters and prisons in order to harm them: something that is eerily similar to the portrayal of gay and lesbian people as predators by homophobic people during Gay Liberation; as are the arguments made on the basis of “protecting children” from an “ideology” and “agenda” that we still see today, a particular example is the discourse surrounding Marriage Equality and LGBT+ Inclusive Education, where lesbian, gay and bisexual were painted as people out to ‘convert’ children.
a major sex hormone produced by the human body, that affect male appearance and sexual development in profound ways, such as those that develop during puberty.
With transgender and gender non conforming individuals, puberty blockers may be prescribed to prevent the related changes in puberty caused by testosterone in those assigned male at birth. Feminising Hormone Therapy will reduce the level of testosterone whilst providing estrogen; Masculinising Hormone Therapy will increase the level of testosterone.
initialism for transgender/nonbinary.
initialism of transgender/non-conforming. Short hand for the various transgender and gender non-conforming identities and community.
a Polari term meaning “penis size” – e.g. “What was the colour of his eyes?”
a Polari term for Piccadilly – a road and surrounding area of Westminster, London, an area that gained a reputation for male prostitution.
a set of pronouns, commonly associated with nonbinary gender identities, although not exclusively, either, as they are also used when referring to people in the plural third-person (e.g. “they marched in the Pride Parade“), but also in a general neutral way, that is, either deliberately not to disclose a person’s gender, or when the gender is unknown.
Some people deliberately choose to use gender-neutral pronouns in order not to disclose a person’s gender and thus avoid gender bias.
Pronoun Usage:
A nonbinary and/or transgender identity in which individuals do not identify as male or female, but a third gender. Also an umbrella term for a wide-variety of gender identities.
The term third gender has also been used in non-Western societies to describe individuals who fall outside of traditional gender norms, roles and expectations, and those societies and cultures that recognise more than two genders.
Sometimes synonymous with nonbinary.
a sexual act between three people of any gender.
three people in an equal relationship; in much the same way two people in a relationship is a couple, three people is a ‘throuple’.
a Polari term for “heart”. For example, “be still, my thumping cheat!”.
a Queer man who enjoys being urinated on for sexual gratification.
a female person who enjoys the activities typically associated with boys or men, or girls who have a boyish appearance.
in Queer male culture, a top is an individual who prefers to be dominant in a sexual dynamic; the “giver” in sexual intercourse, as opposed to a bottom who is the “receiver”.
A part of gender reassignment surgery on the ‘top’ half of the body as opposed to the bottom half. That is, surgery on the breasts, such as the removal of breast tissue (“Transgender Mastectomy“), or indeed, breast implants.
the masculine gender norms that are harmful to men, women and society as a whole.
Such an example is the excusing of bad behaviour, such as violence, control, misogynistic or sexist behaviour, in men as “boys being boys” or “playboy” behaviour. It may be other discriminatory behaviour – such as homophobia or transphobia – where a toxic masculine view is that they are not “man enough” or are a betrayal towards men.
Other such behaviours, such as a need for emotional control, priortising of work, dominance, risk-taking, extreme competitiveness and an incessant drive or preoccupation towards achieving social status have also been shown to result in poor health outcomes for men.
One particular example of toxic masculinity is the idea that men need to be emotionally strong at all times, which results in men fearing at being seen as emotionally weak – a “big boys don’t cry”/”man up” attitude of self-reliance and perceived toughness that has left men with high suicide rates and shorter lifespans, as they are less likely to discuss health problems, particularly mental health problems, with professionals or even friends and family, along with elevated rates of alcoholism.
Toxic masculine attitudes aren’t just possessed by men, however; they can be held by women too, particularly those who have been raised in a way that they accepted such attitudes and behaviours to be normal, and even desirable (that is, they’ve been raised to believe it’s how “real men” think and behave).
Despite the objections from some men about toxic masculinity, it does not refer – at all – to the idea that all masculine traits are bad or damaging. Indeed, there are great many masculine-associated traits that are desirable and healthy.
a Polari term for sex, or someone you have had, or are going to have, sex with – particularly if the sex is on a casual basis.
For example, “I brought someone home last night, but the trade left before I woke up this morning”.
a slang term that was traditionally aimed at transvestites, cross-dressers and Drag Queens, but by association because slang for transsexuals and other transgender individuals and is now considered to be an offensive slur in the transgender community.
However, the term still has prominence – although waning – in cisgender, cross-dressing/transvestite circles (such as those involving Drag Queens), one particular example is the San Francisco club Trannyshack. This in itself is problematic as people often confuse Drag performance with transgender identity.
Despite this, some transgender individuals still use the word and have attempted to reclaim it.
an umbrella term for individuals whose sex assigned at birth and gender identity are not aligned; that is, the array of transgender and nonbinary identities that do not identify as cisgender – although it is important to note that the trans umbrella does not include intersex individuals by default; although a person with an intersex variation may also identify as trans.
Attitudes and beliefs that seek to other transgender individuals from spaces, social institutions and discussions, and the deliberate attempt to withdraw or limit the rights of transgender people.
Although often disputed by those who possess them, such attitudes and beliefs are transphobic.
The term has come into public consciousness due to TERFs (trans-exclusionary radical feminists), who use feminism and women’s rights as a smokescreen for their transphobic views.
Trans-exclusionary thinking isn’t only limited to a vocal minority of feminists, however, it can also be found elsewhere in the Queer community, such as in movements that seek to remove the “T” from LGBT, and seek to silence them in discussions over Queer topics or to gatekeep them from gay venues and spaces.
A man who was assigned female at birth; somebody who is a man and transgender.
A woman who was assigned male at birth; somebody who is a woman and transgender.
An alternative to trans (without the asterisk), an umbrella term to describe the various transgender, nonbinary and gender non-conforming identities.
an individual who was assigned male at birth, but identify with femininity to a greater extent than they do with masculinity.
An identity in its own, transfeminine individuals may also identify in a multitude of other ways, such as being a Trans woman, demigirl, multigender/polygender, genderfluid, demifluid or nonbinary.
Used as an umbrella term for people whose gender identity and/or gender expression differs from their sex assigned at birth. Individuals may identify as male, female, nonbinary or a number of other gender identities.
Not to be confused with transsexual, although many transsexuals may also identify as transgender: but certainly, not all transgender individuals are, or identify with, transsexual.
an umbrella term for transgender and nonbinary individuals as a collective, for example, “the transgender community has fought long and hard for their rights to be recognised by law”; “a support group for the health and wellbeing of the transgender community”.
a form of top surgery sought by nonbinary and transgender individuals assigned female at birth in which breast tissue is removed, in order to a create a masculine chest appearance.
As in to transition, the steps and process taken by transgender/nonbinary individuals to realise their gender identity; such as hormone therapy, puberty blockers, top surgery and/or bottom surgery to alleviate gender dysphoria; the coming out to family and friends; legal steps such as name changes and official gender recognition; use of pronouns. The transitioning process varies from person to person.
The steps a trans person may take to live, and/or been seen as, the gender with which they identify. This may involve a multitude of things; such as medical intervention (such as top surgery and/or bottom surgery, hormone treatment), changing one’s name, changing one’s presentation, the usage of pronouns, and coming out; the journey one takes in order to achieve harmony with their preferred gender expression and rectifying any gender dysphoria.
an individual who was assigned female at birth, but identify with masculinity to a greater extent than they do with femininity.
An identity in its own, transmasculine individuals may also identify in a multitude of other ways, such as being a Trans man, demiboy, multigender/polygender, genderfluid, demifluid or nonbinary.
The range of negative attitudes, intolerance and resentment of transgender individuals.
Transphobia is sadly not restricted to heterosexual people, which has unfortunately been highlighted by the rise in anti-trans activists who are also lesbian, gay, bisexual or asexual; such examples may be TERFs or gender-critical feminists.
Somebody who possesses transphobia would be described as transphobic.
an individual who possesses transphobia; an adjective that describes attitudes and behaviours that possess transphobia; negative, exclusionary, or hostile attitudes or beliefs towards transgender people.
A term previously common in medical and psychological communities to describe transgender individuals who have had a sex change. The term has largely fallen out of favour, with transgender being the preferred terminology, but it is still preferred by some individuals who have changed, or seek to change, their bodies through medical interventions – such individuals may also reject the label transgender in favour of transsexual.
Transsexual should not be used as an umbrella term for transgender people or communities.
An individual who cross-dresses; e.g. a man who wears clothes traditionally associated and worn by women.
In traditional psychological context, a transvestite is usually defined as a person – typically a heterosexual, cisgender male – who dresses in female clothing for sexual pleasure or gratification.
The word can be potentially problematic when transvestitism is conflated and confused with being transgender, or when the traditional psychological context is applied to all people who cross-dress. As such, it’s recommended to use the term with caution. Certainly do not refer to transgender or nonbinary individuals as transvestites, but also do not assume people who do call themselves transvestites are transgender or nonbinary – typically, they identify as cisgender.
People engage in cross-dressing for a variety of reasons, such as for fun or relaxation, for theatrical reasons, or as a form of gender exploration. This may or may not take the form of drag.
an individual that sees themselves as having ‘three’ or ‘triple’ genders, either simultaneously or varying between the three. Typically these genders are seen as male/masculine, female/feminine, and nonbinary.
used in the gay community to describe guys who are skinny, hairless and on the more feminine side. The opposite to a bear.
See also: twunk.
a term originating in Indigenous North American communities in 1990, to describe people who fulfill a traditional third-gender or gender variant role in traditional societies; the “two-spirit” relates to individuals who possess the traditional masculine and feminine qualities.
It should be noted, however, that not all two-spirit individuals associate themselves with the LGBTQIA+ community.
a muscular twink; that is, a more femme-than-butch guy with muscles (although not to the extent of being a body-builder).
a word or phrase that covers a wide range of concepts; in Queer contexts, it refers to a term that refers to a collection of identities, for example “Queer” is in itself an umbrella term for the various sexualities and gender identities that aren’t heterosexual or cisgender, as are terms like LGBT+.
the imagery of the unicorn has been closely associated with Queer culture for a long time, particularly unicorns with rainbow manes and tails.
In Queer slang, a unicorn is also a bisexual person – typically female – that is willing to join an existing couple (predominantly an opposite-sex couple) for sex and fun (either together, or both singularly) without causing any inconvenience to, or having demands of, their relationship. So-called because they “do not, or rarely, exist”. Couples who seek unicorns are known as unicorn hunters.
Queer slang for predominantly opposite-sex couples who seek out bisexuals (typically women) that will engage in sexual activity with both partners, together and/or both singularly, without placing any demands or inconvenience on the relationship.
So called “unicorn hunters” because, apparently, such bisexuals are mythical or rare (like unicorns).
an archaic term for gay men, although it has, in recent years, faced a resurgence as a gender-specific word for homosexuality, comparable to lesbian.
It was first used by Karl Heinrich Ulrichs in his collected booklets, Forschungen über das Räthsel der mannmännlichen Liebe (The Riddle of Man–Manly Love) – 1864-1865.
However, the term also gained traction in paederastic (that is, relating to relationships between adult men and pubescent or adolescent boys) poetry from the 1870s to the 1930, which became known as Uranian poetry, although this was, by no means, the intention of the author (although he did recognise the existence of paederastic men). As such, the term may has certain connotations which are problematic in general use, and as such, the term Vincian may be preferred.
The term emerges in reference to Aphrodite Urania, the Greek Goddess born of Uranus, with the connotation of gay men being ‘men with female psyches’. As such, it was applied also to effeminate men and transfeminine people attracted to men.
a Queer woman who enjoys hanging out with bears.
a Polari term meaning ‘to see’.
a form of sexual intercourse that involves penetration of the vagina by a penis, or an object (such as a sex toy).
a medical surgery in which a vagina is constructed (or reconstructed). A vaginoplasty may be performed on women for a multitude of reasons – including damage to the vagina, or for cosmetic/sexual reasons, but a vaginoplasty may be part of a bottom gender reassignment surgery for transgender and nonbinary individuals.
Controversially, vaginoplasties also take place on intersex children. Although some medical intervention may be needed to prevent or reduce future health problems (such as those related to urinary continence), vaginoplasties (and labiaplasties) are also used as part for cosmetic reasons on intersex children and adolescents without their informed consent, in the attempt to “normalise” their genitals (“corrective surgery“), raising human rights concerns.
Queer slang for Queer men who go out late at night looking for hookups.
an initialism for venereal disease, now referred to as sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
a once common term for sexually transmitted infections.
in Queer culture, somebody who is versatile is someone who is willing and enjoys to be either the top or the bottom during sexual intercourse.
a term, named after Leonardo da Vinci, to describe gay men. Although sometimes used as an alternate for Achillean, the intention is to describe gay men specifically, as an equivalent to lesbian, whereas Achillean, like Sapphic, is meant to include bisexual+ individuals.
a type of bottom gender reassignment surgery, a vulvoplasty is like a vaginoplasty, except without the creation of a vaginal canal. It is a cosmetic procedure that, unlike vaginoplasty, does not allow for penetrative sex.
in the gay community, a wolf is a guy who is lean and muscular in build, with maintained body hair and a high sex drive.
an adult female person; a gender identity, that may also be used in conjunction with other identities – such as a bisexual woman, a gay woman, an asexual woman, etc.
Women typically have female sex characteristics. A cisgender woman is a woman who was assigned female at birth, a Trans woman is a woman who was assigned male at birth.
An intersex woman is a woman who was born with sex characteristics that do not fit typical notions of female biology, and as such, some may have had “corrective surgery” performed on them whilst young to “normalise” their body into being typically female (that is, to look ‘typical’ of what an endosex female body would look like).
However, women may not have typical female sex characteristics, and still be cisgender and endosex (for example, a woman who cannot produce ova).
People who were known to be women, and identified as such, may no longer identify as women: such as Trans men, or nonbinary people.
often intialised to WSW, it is often used in medical terminology to describe female individuals who engage in intimate behaviour with other women.
It is preferred to using sexuality labels because it is inclusive of the vast array of sexual identities within the sexuality spectrum, and avoids making assumptions of somebody’s sexual orientation (e.g. by assuming an individual is lesbian, rather than bisexual).
A common alternate term for this is Sapphic.
initialism for women who have sex with women.
a set of gender neutral pronouns, although far less common than they/them. Nonbinary individuals may opt for the ze/zir pronouns instead of he/him or she/her.
Ze sometimes appears as zie. Both are pronounced as “zee”. Zir is pronounced like “sir” but with a “z”.
It is related to sie/hir, and the pronouns may be used in combination, e.g. “ze/hir”, “sie/zir”, rather than “sie/hir” or “ze/zir”.
Pronoun Usage:
a Polari term meaning ‘to style, or do up’: for example, ‘give your hair a quick zhoosh’. It has also become common parlance outside of the Queer community.